


Nightsky

by Shadowcat221b



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: AU, Implied Bottom!Jensen, M/M, Slavery, Supernatural and J2 Big Bang Challenge 2016, Violence, bottom!Jared, implied dub-con (not between the j´s), implied non-con (not between the j´s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-07
Updated: 2016-07-07
Packaged: 2018-07-22 04:08:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 23,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7419175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowcat221b/pseuds/Shadowcat221b
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One night in a jail cell, 16 year old Jared meets 20 year old Jensen, a fellow enslaved Gifted, a person who can control an element.<br/>Twelve years later they meet again, Jensen being caught by Jared´s owner. Jared is supposed to nurse him back to health so Jensen can be publicly executed.<br/>And that is just the beginning.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> A huge thank you to everyone who helped me with my first big bang!  
> My amazing artist, kaelysta, who made so much art for the story, incorporated so many tiny details and left me baffled. Go check out her art post over on livejournal, at http://kaelysta.livejournal.com/70209.html  
> Thank you to my beta´s sophoklesworld and bunteslicht!  
> Thank you to wendy who made this challenge possible.  
> And thank you to you, person reading this :)  
> I love you all <3  
> the shadowcat

Jared woke up with a start. He was surrounded by darkness, soft and suffocating. His ribs hurt and the silver band around his wrist felt tighter than usual. It took him a moment to clear his mind enough to remember what had happened.

He had been sold to yet another slaver, they were on their way to the next market.

Gods, if only his head wouldn´t hurt so much.

He couldn´t recall why he was here, where ever 'here' exactly was.

When he tried to move he noticed the iron cuff around his ankle, keeping him chained to the wall he was half propped up against.

Jared took a deep breath, feeling the cold of the stone seep through his tunic. He contemplated if he should try to sleep for a while longer or if he should stay up and try to clear his head further.

Just as he was about to try to relax, he heard something that made him bolt upright within a second.

There was a small shuffle somewhere right to him, something large, moving around.

Then a rasping, like someone cleared their throat.

And then a voice.

»So you finally woke up.«

Every muscle in Jared´s body was tense, his stiff fingers curling into fists, readying himself for whatever might follow.

He didn´t answer. He just waited. For what he wasn´t sure.

»Oh gods, please don´t tell me you are one of those poor bastards who got their tongue ripped out«, the voice said a few moments later, when the silence had stretched until it was almost as suffocating and thick as the black surrounding him.

He took another deep breath, uncurling his fingers, before asking in a clipped tone: »What is it to _you_?«

The answer was quick, yet calm.

»I have been down here for the Gods know how long, talking to no one but myself and now finally someone else is here. Would be a shame if they couldn´t talk to me, wouldn´t it?«

Jared thought about the words. He briefly considered how he would feel if he were locked inside this prison or whatever it was for longer than a few days. He would go insane.

»Then talk«, he said.

The voice chuckled. »The entire point is that I get to hear something different than my own voice for a little while.«

Jared huffed at that. Meanwhile he constructed a mental image of what the owner of the voice might be like.

The voice was rough around the edges, yet smooth underneath, warm and somewhat soothing. It sounded male, but the person it belonged to had to be young. Late teen years or early twenties. The voice was laced with something, a tone only few others had had in their voice when Jared encountered them.

It was the sound of a gifted who had once known what it meant to be free.

»You did not fall asleep on me, did you?«, the voice ripped Jared out of his thoughts again.

»No«, Jared answered. »No.«

»Do you have a name?«, the voice asked.

»I had one once and many since. Liked practically none of them«, Jared answered.

»Want to tell me?«, the voice said, tone warmer than before, guarded curiosity evident.

»Why should I? Do you have one you would tell me in return?«, Jared huffed.

»Because out there, no one cares if you have a name. To them you are nothing. I know how good it feels to have someone call you by your name. Makes you feel like a person again. But hey, maybe that´s just me. I haven´t heard someone else say my name in a long time. Longer than I dare to admit. Just thought you would like to hear yours as long as you still know that it belongs to you. Because trust me, you forget it with time.«

»What is your name then? When you want to hear it so badly?«, Jared said, his own curiosity awoken.

He didn´t know why, yet he felt himself drawn to the voice. He knew that it was dangerous. Curiosity, opening up, emotions. But he couldn´t help it.

The voice chuckled again, deep and rich.

»Jensen. My name is Jensen.«

Jared heard the words, picking up the name and rolling it around in his mind. Wrapping his thoughts around the sounds, before they morphed into something else. Another name.

The silence was stretching once more, this time not suffocating, more like a blanket, keeping him safe.

When he opened his mouth again, the words he said weren´t the ones he had intended to say.

»My father used to call me Jared. My mother called me Tristan. I have no idea why. Of course that was before...«, noticing he had already said too much he trailed off, locking away the memories that were about to resurface.

The voice, Jensen, Jared reminded himself, let out something that sounded like half a laugh half a sob, before speaking again.

»It is a pleasure to meet you Jared Tristan.«

Then there was silence again.

This time Jared was the one to speak up.

His tone was tentative, as if the wrong word would make Jensen disappear. Or worse.

»Jensen?«

»Yes?«

»Are you...«, Jared didn´t know how to ask any other way, »are you gifted?«

»Yeah«, came the reply. Jensen sounded heartbroken. »Otherwise I wouldn´t be here, would I?«

Knowing that this topic was sensitive, Jared pushed further. He knew that he shouldn´t. Knew it had to be painful for Jensen to talk about it. But his own curiosity wouldn´t let it rest.

»How long before they caught you?«

»Almost eleven years.«

The following silence was crushing.

»That is a long time«, Jared finally said.

»It is. It still feels like they ripped out a part of me.«, Jensen sounded detached, like it had happened to someone else. Not him. »How about you?«

»Me?«, Jared thought about it. »I don´t know. I was a late-bloomer. Mother said it was a blessing, even before the war, when things started getting worse for us. They caught me when I was eight years and a few moons, I barely started sensing. I don´t know what gift I have. It is hard to miss something when you never knew it in the first place. So I guess I got lucky after all«, Jared thumbed over the silver bracelet on his left wrist.

»Wow«, Jensen whispered. »You really have no clue what your gift is?«

Jared shook his head. »No. Mother always said I´d be something like water. Said she felt it deep down. And now I´ll never know.«

»I´m sorry«, Jensen said, his words sincere, emotion returning to his voice.

»What´s yours?«, Jared sighed, trying to steer his thoughts away from his mother, from the look in her blank dead eyes after the soldiers had taken his home.

»Earth«, Jensen answered. »I hid in the woods for a few years. It was manageable, a little... lonely sometimes. But I lived.«

Jared turned his head towards where Jensen had to be. »I envy you. Your kind is rare.«

»Our kind is rare, Jared«, Jensen corrected him.

 

»Have you ever been up north? Like Thalor?«, Jared asked after another round of silence.

»Yeah... I spent five years up there«, Jensen answered, his voice sounding as if he was drifting away.

»Tell me about it?«, Jared whispered, hoping that Jensen´s voice would take him to places that he had only ever heard of.

»Okay«, Jensen said, »But then it is your turn.«

When he spoke again his voice sounded as if he was already far away and Jared eagerly followed him.

»The best about Thalor are the winters. When you are just at the edge of the woods and night is falling. The leafless trees are nothing but stark black shadows against the pale blue evening sky. The air is crisp and alive, there is snow for miles and miles to see. It is all glowing with the last streams of sunlight. And while that is breathtaking by itself, the most amazing thing you can witness is the night. The skies are so clear that you can see a million stars. And for every moment you watch the sky new stars appear. As if they just waited for you to show and look for them. They set on the tree skeletons like water droplets on a spider web. They shine like pure silver melting through the dark blue velvet of night. The stars are the reason the northerners speak so softly. Have you ever heard the northern tongue, Jay?«

Captivated by the story Jared shook his head, having entirely forgotten that Jensen could not see him.

Jensen seemed to understand him nonetheless. He continued: »When you look up at the skies and all life is frozen around you they seem to be the only thing that will keep you warm. You know the southern tongue, Jay, right? With its harsh sounds and that galloping rhythm. Northern tongue is the opposite. It is melody. The wind shaking the leaves in the summer and the velvet skies of winter nights.«

There was a pause, stretching until Jared thought Jensen was done with the story.

»Jay«, Jensen said. »Can you remember two phrases for me?«

Jared took a moment to breathe out his answering 'yes', not minding the nickname Jensen had already given him.

»Repeat after me, ok? _Iò thánen.«_

Jared was rendered speechless for a second. Jensen´s voice melted around the words spoken, the vowels soft and gentle and the th not as hissed as it would have been in the south but flowing like silk. Northern tongue was not at all like the southern one he was used to. He tried repeating the words back to Jensen, who gently explained what he could improve and how. It only took a couple of tries for him to get it right enough for Jensen to move on to the next phrase.

» _Khalla bethín«_

Again Jared repeated the phrase, this time not taking as long to get it right.

»Thank you«, Jensen said once Jared finished, smile lighting up his inflections.

»Jensen«, Jared asked then, »what do the words mean? I don´t want to accidentally insult anyone.«

»You won´t, trust me«, Jensen laughed. With a more serious tone he continued: »The second one means " _Stay strong"_.«

»And the first?«

»I´ll tell you that the next time we meet, face to face«, Jensen replied, leaving a bitter sweet taste of hope in Jared´s heart. »Now, your turn. Tell me something, Jared. Anything.«

»Give me a second to think of something«, Jared answered, slowly retreating from the images Jensen had painted in his head to find what he could share in return.

The absence of any sound except for Jensen´s even breathing told Jared that he was waiting patiently.

»I think I´ve got something«, Jared said after a minute or two. »I grew up about a days travel from the Western Harbor on Kashawar. So sometimes my dad would take me there, back when I was really young. Before the war really started. I don´t remember a lot, but what I remember is this«, he cleared his throat, stalling a little to phrase his description so it sounded a bit more like Jensen´s tale. »The Harbor was always full of life. Humans, Shifters, Gifted. There was this energy in the air, it made me feel like nothing would ever change, like life would always be this perfect. The sailors brought stuff from all over the isles. Gems and fabrics from Cillian, small and bigger statues of stone made on Drashnikk, you name it, you could find it somewhere in the Western Harbor. And the colors, Jensen. The colors. Kashawar is mostly earthy reds and yellows, mixed with the occasional green, but there? Blues that changed like the ocean itself. Some gems sparkling and some just glowing from within. The many different stones of Drashnikk. Some grey, some almost violet, others like silver. It was breathtaking.

But what I loved the most was standing almost on the edge of the plateau, the market a constant buzz behind me, the wind in my hair. The sun burning the ground and the ocean at my feet.«

He paused. The next words hurt, even after all this time. »The last time I saw the ocean was two years ago when they shipped me here. Since then I have been just dragged around the isle, sold almost every few months. Nobody thinks I am useful enough to be worth the trouble. I guess it won´t be long until I end up at one of the brothels.«

 

Jensen was quiet and Jared was almost about to ask him jokingly if he hadn´t liked the story and thought about apologizing for ruining the mood. But then Jensen broke the silence, voice thoughtful. »You won´t, Jay.«

»Why would you think that? I have nothing left to offer, Jensen«, Jared whispered bitterly.

»Jared. You are smart. Just get one person, one person, to teach you anything you need your mind for and your value will increase immensely.«

»I am not smart, not smart enough. And even if, how? How do I get someone to teach me anything?«, Jared shot back, defensive but also a little bit curious.

»You already got me teaching you something«, Jensen countered.

»You offered, that doesn´t count.«

»I offered you the phrases, you asked for their meaning.«

»And you only told me one of them.«

Jensen sighed. »Jared, you can always learn. Keep your eyes open, I know you already do that. Watch people and learn. Ask other slaves if they can teach you. Don´t ask for too much or they will refuse in fear that you will replace them. Be smart but don´t be too smart. I know you can do it.«

Jared was stunned by Jensen´s little rant, so he did not reply immediately.

»Promise me, Jared Tristan, that you will learn everything you can. It will save your life.« There was an urgency in Jensen´s voice that made it impossible for Jared to refuse, even if he still couldn´t really believe the other man.

»I promise.«

»Good«, Jensen responded, a little bit of relief evident in his voice.

They sat in silence again.

»How far can you move?«, Jared spoke up, an idea forming in his mind.

»Not far«, Jensen replied. »They chained my wrists together and connected them to the wall. Maybe a foot? You?«

»I don´t know, my hands are free, my ankle is chained though«, Jared responded, mind working. »The wall is at your back, right? Move left as far as you can, ok?«

»Ok«, Jensen answered. The next sound that filled the air was the rattle of the chains sliding against the floor, then pulling taunt. Jared reached out and could feel steel bars against his fingertips. So there were two or more cells down here. His heart sank a little.

»Jensen?«

»I´m here.« Jensen´s voice sounded much closer now.

»Can you reach the bars?«, Jared asked.

There was a clank followed by a sharp hiss from Jensen. »No. Jared, I am sorry, I can´t move any further.«

Jared sighed. »I can reach a little through the bars, maybe I can make up for what you are missing?«

 

He reached through the bars, straining to touch, moving his hand through the dark. He heard Jensen´s chain rattle again, accompanied by a sharp intake of breath as Jensen obviously struggled against the pain of the chains chaffing his wrists.

Then Jared´s fingertips barely grazed rough skin, but in the blink of an eye the contact was lost, his muscles protesting against the stretch.

He almost thought he had imagined it when Jensen spoke. »You are warm.«

Jared smiled as he rested his forehead on the cold bars.

»Jay, I don´t think I will be able to do this again. My wrist is bleeding«, Jensen mumbled, teeth gritted together.

»Don´t worry. This was. You. It´s ok«, Jared answered in a tumble of words.

»Thank you«, Jensen replied.

They sat in silence, hearing the other breathe so closely.

 


	2. Chapter 2

_Twelve years later_

Jared woke up with a start. He was surrounded by black, only broken by the light of the moon shining through the small window in his tiny chamber.

His mind was still caught up in his dream. The dream he had every few months and that left him feeling hollow yet whole all the same every time.

He had dreamed of a faceless stranger. No, not a stranger. Jensen. He dreamed of sitting beneath a moonless night sky that was filled with stars, Jensen a warm presence beside him.

Jared would never look at him, just sit there and feel. Sometimes he would close his eyes, pillow his head on Jensen´s chest and sense the rumble Jensen´s words sent through his body.

Jensen would talk about everything. He would tell Jared about the way it felt, being connected to one´s element. He would talk about his favourite places, stories, tastes.

And Jared would listen. He always listened. Content.

Everytime Jared dreamed about Jensen, he´d tell him something new, but his voice was still the same.

Jared didn´t know how he could still remember Jensen´s voice so vividly. As present as that night twelve years ago.

He sank back against his bed, pulled his thin blanket back over him and tried drifting back to sleep.

A sound outside his window, a rustling, as if something large was being dragged across the sandy earth outside brought him back to alertness.

He quickly made his way to peek out his window. Despite the moonlight he could only make out the silhouettes of two of the guards dragging a limp figure to the main entrance.

Jared quickly went back to bed.

This was dangerous.

Curiosity was dangerous.

He could not risk getting his nose stuck in something he shouldn´t know when just now, after years of hard work, he was almost perceived as a human being by his owners.

He had the little room and even though it was not technically his, it felt like it.

He was the healer responsible for the other slaves now that the former one, the one they all had known as Beaver, had passed away due to old age. He had more liberties than most of the slaves here.

He touched his collarbone, where the sigil of the Cortese family was branded into his skin.

His life was far from perfect, but it was as good as it could get for an owned man.

* * *

 

_Whip. Crack. White hot pain. They hadn´t let him sleep._

_Whip. Crack. He could feel his blood trickling down his back, slick and thick._

_Whip. Crack. They hadn´t even asked a single question yet._

_Whip. Crack. His world began to blur. His one eye was already swollen shut._

_Whip. Crack. He didn´t know how long ago they had caught him. What he did know was that he was going to be dead by sunrise._

_Whip. Crack. Dark. He didn´t care to open his eyes._

_Whip. Crack. Just one more and it would all be over._

_Whip. Crack._

* * *

 

 

In the afternoon while he was cleaning one of the storage rooms a guard came to fetch Jared.

»Boy! You have a patient«, the guard nearly snapped. Jared didn´t even blink at the name anymore, the daughter of Lord Cortese, Genevieve, had given it to him when she had seen him at the market and never cared to give him a new one, even though it did not fit with his broad frame anymore.

Jared nodded, keeping his head bowed, but eyes not on the floor like a slave was supposed to, following the guard to the rooms in the lower level of the castle.

When he saw the person lying on their stomach on the wooden examination table his heart stopped for a second.

The man´s entire back was covered in bloody angry gashes. His face was swollen, the lip split, bruises all across the side of his torso that Jared could see.

Dried blood stuck his hair to his face and his meager pants to his legs.

»By the gods, what have you done to him?«, Jared whispered, not trusting his voice.

»You don´t need to know«, the guard snapped.

»I do«, Jared stated, his voice getting firmer by the second. »I need to know so I can treat him right.«

»Wait here«, the guard answered.

Jared huffed. As if he would be going anywhere anytime soon. The guard turned around, walking away to find whatever authority he needed.

Meanwhile Jared quickly gathered a small bowl from one of the cabinets and filled it with some of the water that was always available in the room.

He took a deep breath before stepping closer to the lifeless figure on the table.

Upon closer inspection he could see the back rising the tiniest bit.

So the man was still alive.

Jared sent a quick prayer to the gods, thanking them. He could save this one.

He hoped.

First he had to get the dried blood off of him, to assess the damage.

He dipped a soft linen cloth into the lukewarm water before gently, carefully wiping a tip of it over the man´s face. This man hadn´t been clean in weeks.

He took care not to put too much pressure on the bruises and the swelling. Then he started to talk.

It was something that the old healer had told him. Even when they are unconscious, talk to your patient. It will help them heal. Give them a reason to.

And this poor bastard would need all the help he could get.

He talked about meaningless things, like the oat meal he had had for breakfast, his voice soft and warm.

After cleaning all of the face he could reach, Jared made his way over to neck and shoulders.

Carefully avoiding the gashes he touched the flesh, looking for any damage under the skin in the process.

When the guard returned Jared had already changed the water twice because it had been black with dried blood and dirt.

»He has been whipped till he passed out, then kicked and beaten. He got what he deserved. That is all I am supposed to tell you«, the guard said in a clipped tone, before walking out again, taking his post beside the door.

Jared swallowed hard. Then returned to his task at hand.

By the time he had cleaned the man as best as he could given the circumstances his throat was sore and he was tired.

But he had to keep going because this was not a state he could leave his patient in for the night.

While he had cleaned him, Jared had made a few mental notes about his patient.

He was male, judging by the size of his shoulders and the defined muscles of his arms, strong, at least as old as Jared, a little underfed, had dirty blondish hair, a wildly grown beard and scars scattered all over his body, one in particular on his right arm branding him as a rogue gifted.

None of his fingers were broken, luckily. There were angry red marks on his wrists and ankles where the rope and shackles that had most likely carried his weight during the whipping had dug in deep. Jared suspected that a few of his ribs were cracked, his heartbeat was steady and stronger than he had hoped, though still incredibly weak. His left eye was swollen shut and his entire back... His back was worst of all.

Jared walked over to the cabinets, collecting a few herbs that would be anti septic, some that would help with the swelling and some to enhance the healing process. Then he mixed them all together into a paste, before gently applying it to the injured flesh.

When he was done it was well after midnight, judging by the moon hanging low in the night sky. Jared had been so lost in his work that he hadn´t noticed the guard coming in and lighting the candles and the lamps.

Now he looked over to his corner, the little space he had created to sleep when he needed to have an eye on his patients at all times.

He settled there, closing his eyes and drifting off.

 

A few hours later he was woken by pained huffs followed with a keening whimper. The sound was shredded, as if his patient had broken glass stuck in his throat. Jared suspected that it was some dirt that he had swallowed alongside some blood. He prayed that it was just that and not internal bleeding from any vital organs like lungs that caused his patient to cough so badly.

Within seconds he was up at his feet, crouching beside the table, carefully stroking the man´s hair, trying to calm him before taking a look..

»So you came back, huh?«, he said, voice nothing more than a low rumble.

»I know it doesn´t sound like it, but that´s a good thing. Trust me.«

Jared saw the man´s face twitch, as much as the swollen flesh allowed and the coughing ceased, yet his breaths were still labored and almost panicked.

Jared made a small shushing noise, continuing his tender strokes at the nape of the others neck.

»It´s okay. I´m here. It´s all going to be okay.«

He sat there for what felt like a small eternity but couldn´t have been more than a few minutes before the man calmed down.

When he was fast asleep Jared went back to his own bed again.

 

The next morning some guy Jared didn´t know came to bring him his morning oatmeal from the kitchen since he couldn´t leave his patient for longer than it took him to relieve himself. The guy had striking blue eyes, blonde hair and an aura of arrogance that Jared had never encountered in a servant before. A quick look on the guy´s exposed forearms told him he was a free man. That explained the attitude at least a little.

»So how´s that one doing?«, the guy asked, eyeing his patient from the side.

»I don´t see how that is any of your business«, Jared remarked, transferring his oatmeal from the bowl to a plate and cleaning the bowl. It would come in handy while cleaning the patient´s wounds again.

»Sorry I asked, just tried making conversation«, the guy snarked defensively, rolling his eyes.

»You have an attitude problem«, Jared retorted rolling up his own sleeves before filling the bowl with warm water.

The guy raised an eyebrow and something in his tone changed the tiniest bit as he spoke again.

»Fine. I´ll go then, tell the guard when you need anything, I´ll bring it«, with that he turned on his heel and left.

Jared shook his head at the weird encounter, returning to the task at hand.

After treating his patient he sat down to eat his now cold oatmeal, letting his mind wander.

He had seen his share of injured people over the last years, but never one this severe. The Cortese family treated their slaves like property, just like anyone else. But to them their property had value. This one had to have done something incredibly offensive to deserve the treatment he had gotten.

Jared shook his head. It was none of his business.

 

»I´m Mykhal, in case you were wondering«, the blonde guy introduced himself as he put down Jared´s dinner on one of the cabinets. Jared applied new herbal cream to the gashes on his patients back, focused on the task at hand.

»You from up north?«, he asked, voice indifferent. »Yeah, how´d you know?«, the guy squinted at him. »Lucky guess«, Jared replied tight lipped. He didn´t need to tell him that he had known from how he had pronounced the _k_ in his name. That Jensen had taught him how to soften the harsh sound. »Well aren´t you just a ray of sunshine«, Mykhal muttered, turning to look at what Jared was doing.

»I am working«, Jared grit out. «So unless you have anything useful to contribute, I suggest you leave and let me do my job.«

Mykhal rolled his eyes and left, not saying another word.

 

* * *

 

 

His patient was gradually getting better.

The swelling of his face was going down, revealing handsome features that were still partially covered by the beard and that Jared did not dare to admire.

Then next night though everything changed.

He was changing the old cloth on the man´s back when he caught a movement in the corner of his eye.

Writing it off as a trick of his imagination he got back to work. Until he felt the graze of finger tips against his skin and heard an unintelligible mumble.

His patient had woken up.

Immediately Jared crouched down beside the man´s face, focusing on his lips to make out what he was saying, noting that his eyes were still closed.

The man´s voice was rough, hoarse and the words, as far as Jared could make them out, concerning.

»You remind me of someone«, his patient croaked.

For once Jared didn´t know what to say, so he only blankly stared at the man.

He was about to open his mouth when the man spoke again.

»You got a name?«

»They call me boy, but my name is Jared«, he answered, seeing that his patient was already drifting back to unconsciousness, the drugs in his system quickly pulling him under again.

 

»I could tell you why he looks like that«, Mykhal quipped one time while bringing Jared his breakfast. »God for you«, Jared replied crankily. He hadn´t gotten a lot of sleep last night and the little sleep he had had was filled with vague dreams that left him confused and scared.

»That bastard´s a bloody traitor«, Mykhal told him, even though he hadn´t asked. »Seems like he´s with the rebels or something. Guess he wasn´t so smart, getting caught and all. But hell, who cares if another of those worthless gifted dies, am I right?«

In that moment Jared was incredibly proud of himself for not taking the bait, not punching Mykhal´s smug grin of his face right then and there, but calmly, icy cold, replying: »I suggest you leave. Now.«

»I don´t even know why I´m still here«, Mykhal snarled, glaring at Jared one last time before exiting the room. Jared let out a deep breath as the tension practically drained out of him. He had a lot of work to do. He couldn´t allow himself to care about his patient. About what Mykhal had said. In the eyes of a free man every escaped slave was a traitor.

He gathered his strength, finishing his morning routine of changing his patients bandages, applying new herbs and checking the wounds for any infections.

Then he would have to go and pick up some of his usual chores, since his patient didn´t require his attention all day and night anymore.

 

That night Jared tossed and turned on his thin mattress. He dreamed of Jensen. It was not his usual dream though. This time it was dark, deep blue and black. There were only mere shadows visible. Jensen´s voice, pained and broken, screaming through the darkness, screaming for Jared. Jared could barely move, cold iron restraining him, chains wound tight around his body. He heard a dull thud, a lifeless body falling. Heard a bodyless voice cackle over another worthless gifted dying. Another life that had ended and meant nothing to the voice. It had meant something to Jared. He pulled forward, blindly reaching like he had all those years ago. Now his fingers did not find and feel warm, rough skin but thick, hot blood. It ran through his fingers as he touched Jensen´s dead body, soaking his own skin. He couldn´t wake up, he tried but he couldn´t. The fear that something had happened to Jensen, that he lay somewhere in an unmarked grave because he had crossed a free man was too real, too tangible. Jared tried waking up but he couldn´t. His dream, the hope that Jensen was out there, alive, somewhere, broken by the words of a man he barely knew.

A dream broken by reality.

In his dream Jared gathered Jensen´s body in his arms, as much as his restraints allowed. He cried. He did not cry long. No, soon he just sat there, mourning quietly, because no words he knew could describe how he felt. How he felt at the mere thought of losing someone he had only known for a few hours.

His mother had once told him that he cared too much. Maybe she had been right. He hadn´t cared this much in years.

 

* * *

 

 

»Lady Cortese demands your presence as soon as you think you can leave your patient alone«, Sandy, one of the kitchen maids, told Jared in a hushed voice as he went to get his midday meal the next day.

»I´ll see to it«, Jared answered, thoughts still miles and years away. »Do it and do it quick, she´s been pissed ever since you stopped pleasuring her«, Sandy mumbled. These words brought Jared back to reality, his mouth becoming a tight line. »I am a healer, not a pleasure slave.«

»I know that. Tell that to her. She is the one demanding your presence in her bedroom every two nights«, Sandy went up to her tiptoes to put her hand on Jared´s cheek. »I just want you safe.«

Jared nodded his thanks, giving her a smile that didn´t reach his eyes. »I know, Sands. I know.«

 

The same evening his patient was awake again. Jared had been rambling quietly while cleaning his face. He had thrown in the two phrases Jensen had taught him all these years ago, hoping he still remembered them correctly. It was then that he saw the corner of his patients mouth curve upward before he opened his mouth to speak. His voice was still rough from the long time it hadn`t been used and the words were mumbled, yet Jared could make them out perfectly.

» _Iò thanenín, Tristan._ So you already figured out what it means _?«_

Jared needed a second to snap out of his shock, putting the cloth aside and moving so he was on eye level with his patient.

»I never told you that name. I never told anyone that name«, he whispered, not daring to believe. This could not be happening. Fate could not be this cruel.

»You told me, that night all these years ago«, green eyes blinked open, groggy and unfocused at first but quickly turning sharp as they locked with Jared´s wide open hazel ones.

»Jensen«, Jared breathed out. He carefully reached out a hand to stroke over his face, convinced this had to be a dream fueled by his wishful thinking paired with sleepless nights. Jensen would dissolve the second he would touch him. Except, he didn´t.

»Your voice is different«, Jared noted as his fingertips traveled over the rough hair on Jensen´s jaw to his cheekbones, temple and finally the nape of his neck, where he rested it carefully.

»Yours is too«, Jensen replied, voice getting steadier with every word spoken.

»Then how?«, Jared asked, watching the green emeralds that were Jensen´s eyes follow his every move.

»It´s the way you speak. That did not change. Well, it did, but some things you still say the same way. I figured if it wasn´t you, you would just think of my words as if they were part of a fever dream. It was worth a shot.«

Jared´s face split into a wide grin. »I can´t believe it. I can´t believe this is real.«

»You have dimples«, Jensen said, still a little fuzzy from the meds, with a dopey grin mirroring Jared´s.

Jared´s expression turned a bit more serious then, a smile still on his lips though. »So what does it mean?« It did not take Jensen long to figure out what he referred to. »Which one?«, Jensen asked in return. » _Iò thánen_ or _Iò thanenín_?«

»Both«, Jared responded.

Jensen smiled again, this time with little wrinkles appearing in the corner of his eyes. » _Iò thánen_ means _'I care'_. _Iò thanenín_ means _'You are cared for'_ or _'I care about you'_. See? I told you I would one day be able to tell you.«

»You did. I didn´t believe you. I wanted it to be true so bad but I didn`t believe you«, Jared muttered, mesmerized by the life in Jensen´s eyes.

»To be honest, I didn´t believe myself either«, murmured Jensen, eyes closing again. »M´sorry. Tired...«

»Don´t worry«, Jared swiped his thumb over the corner of his eye where moments ago little crinkles had been. »I promise I will be here in the morning.«

Jensen´s features relaxed, yet Jared could swear he saw a smile just at the corners of his mouth.

With one last caress he got up again, resuming his work before going to sleep himself.

What he had thought in the beginning was now even more true than when he had first seen him. He would do anything he could to save him.

 

Jared got up, his duty fulfilled, ready to leave as Genevieve called for him to stay. »Just a moment longer«, she pleaded. As Jared settled beside her petite form she furrowed her brow, eyeing him incredulously. »Your thoughts haven´t been with me in quite a while, boy. Why?« Jared did everything to avoid her searching gaze. »Tell me«, she said softly, the tone making it sound like a request but her fingers stroking over the brand on his collarbone revealing the command it really was.

Jared´s mind was reeling, trying to come up with an answer that had enough truth in it to be believable but not enough to be dangerous. »I take it you know about my patient?«, Jared inquired, buying himself a few more seconds. »Of course. The traitor. I was the one who sent him to your care. What is wrong with him?« Jared mentally steeled himself before continuing. His next words would decide both his and more importantly Jensen´s fate, so he had to sell the part. Acting like he was desperate and torn up inside wasn´t that hard though.

»Nothing is... He... He is my brother«, he watched Genevieve´s eyes widen in surprise, but didn´t get a further response. »He- The last time I saw him was twelve years ago. We were both being dragged to different ships in the harbor and I thought I would never see him again. And then he- and then fate brings him to me and I have to nurse him back to health just so he lives long enough to see his own execution and-«, Jared´s voice broke and he could feel the warm tears sliding down his cheeks. They surprised him a little. He hadn´t thought he would lose his composition so fast. Genevieve just looked at him. It seemed like an eternity until she spoke. »I never knew you had a brother«, she whispered, a small wisp of emotion breaking through her skillfully crafted mask. Jared smiled then, a bitter smile. »You never cared to ask for my name, why would I tell you about my brother who I thought was dead?« Jared could see Genevieve crumbling even though she hid it quite well. »Lady Cortése, I can´t watch my brother die knowing that there was just the idea, the smallest tiniest possibility that I could have done anything to save him. Please, Genevieve, I need your help. Please, I would do anything to save my brother. He´s a good man, he saved my life more than once. I owe him. Help me, I beg you.« He could see that she had bought his choked up words, desperate and deep down true.

»Three days. And three conditions.«

Jared looked up, eyes almost hopeful. »What conditions?«

»I help you and you get your brother out of here in the next three days. But only him. You will stay. You will never speak of him again or else they know you helped him. You will devote all time you have to me. For that your brother will have his life spared until the next Lord finds him. I will vouch that you were with me at the time of his escape. I will take care of the guards and give your brother a day´s head start. The rest is up to you. These terms are non-negotiable. Do you agree to these terms?«

Jared stared at her. This was better than he could have hoped for. »I agree. I promise«, he rushed out, hope and relief flooding him.

»Swear, boy«, Genevieve said, her jaw set but her eyes soft.

»I swear«, Jared responded.

 

»Where were you?«, Jensen asked as Jared returned to the room. »I woke up and you weren´t here.« »I´m sorry, the Lady called for me«, Jared replied, eyes cast down.

»Oh«, the sound escaped Jensen´s lips. »Why the long face?«

Jared pulled a stool over to the table, sitting down near Jensen´s head, who propped himself up on his elbows. »I am getting you out of here.«

Jensen looked at him, eyes wide: »At what cost?«

»Jensen-«

»Don´t Jared, what are you paying for it?«, Jensen snapped, his voice firm.

»I´ll stay here. Forever«, Jared answered, not meeting Jensen´s eyes.

The fingertips stroking his cheek startled him.

»I am not worth it, Jay«, Jensen whispered. »I am not worth your shot at freedom.«

»How can you say that?«, Jared looked up and he could feel the tears welling up as he saw Jensen´s expression. He looked like he was at peace with his death, serene.

»Jaybird, I was meant to die so many times. One of these days I´ll have to. I am living on borrowed time. I did many things others would deem immoral that seemed necessary back then. My life is not worth yours.«

»You´re wrong. Lives are equal. And I don´t have any freedom I could give up. I couldn´t live with myself knowing that you were killed and I could have stopped it. Don´t ask that of me, Jensen, don´t ask that of me«, Jared pleaded, reaching out to touch the man infront of him.

»Jay, they will kill you, if-«

»No, they won´t«, Jared cut in. »The lady protects me. We have a bargain. My service for your freedom. She won´t sell us out. I know her, she... I trust her.«

Jensen looked at him for a long moment, expression unreadable. »Do you love her?«, he finally asked.

»Like I imagine a brother would love a sister«, Jared replied.

»I don´t like this bargain«, Jensen stated. »But I will go along with it, because I can see why you want me to. I don´t like the terms you agreed to, but I can´t change them. If it is the one thing I can do to make you feel better I will.«

Jared laughed then, a short, cut off sound. »I want to save your life and you let me because of me? God you are so incredibly - incredibly -, I don´t even know a word for it. Let´s get started then. We have three days to make and execute a plan.«

 

The next days consisted of Jared keeping up his facade, all while plotting with Genevieve and Jensen. It didn´t take them long to come up with a plan. Genevieve would take care of the guards, knowing their schedule. Jensen would get a small bindle with enough food for a few days and a knife and on Jared´s signal make a run for the near forest. From there he would be on his own.

Before running Jensen would knock Jared out, so it wouldn´t look like he had helped him. Jared would never admit it, but he found it twistedly comforting that he wouldn´t see Jensen running away from him. He would just disappear.

 

They had agreed that it would be helpful for Jensen to cut his hair and shave off his beard, making it harder for the guards to recognize him, which was how they ended up with Jensen sitting on the table and Jared standing between his splayed legs.

»Now, don´t move«, Jared whispered, fingertip under Jensen´s chin gently tipping his head up. Jared set the sharp razor blade on Jensen´s throat, dragging it up carefully. The skin revealed beneath the rough hair of the beard was smooth and fair. Jared skillfully shaved Jensen, every stroke precise. Jared did everything not to think about the warm skin he felt touching Jensen, not to see the open trusting look in Jensen´s eyes as he observed every move Jared made. He did not think about how one wrong angle, a little bit too much pressure and a move too fast could easily destroy this work of art.

Soon he turned Jensen´s head this way and that, every calculated stroke of the blade revealing more of the gorgeous man underneath his fingertips. As he was done he leaned in a little, looking for anything he might have missed, thumb and fingers of his left hand still on Jensen´s chin, guiding him.

He found a little bit of shaving cream still on the full swell of Jensen´s bottom lip and without thinking he swiped it away with his thumb. It was then that he really saw Jensen, not just the lines he had concentrated on to follow moments earlier, but Jensen in all his parts. Green eyes, golden sprinkles in them from the soft light of the lamp, calm and serene, focused on Jared, framed by long lashes. A small scar on his chin, barely distinguishable from the skin around it. Full pink lips, perfectly bowed and now slightly open, Jared´s thumb still caught on the bottom one. A nose, not perfectly straight, like it had been broken once, but healed well. Face delicate, yet strong, contradicting itself in its beauty. All across his cheeks, that were colored with a little blush, freckles were scattered. And Jared wanted to trace every curve, every freckle.

They both did not dare move for it would break the spell.

In the end they both broke at the same time, Jensen casting his eyes down and Jared taking away his hand. It took them a little longer though to wake from their trance.

 

»Three minutes«, Genevieve quipped from her post at the door.

»Thank you«, Jensen spoke to Genevieve. »An Ackles doesn´t forget kindness.« He then turned to Jared. »I guess that´s it then«, Jensen said, voice void of any emotion. Jared nodded and tried swallowing past the lump in his throat. They couldn´t say who moved first, yet in the blink of an eye they were clinging on to each other like they were hanging on for dear life. Jared wrapped his arms around Jensen´s torso so tight he feared he might crush the smaller man. Jensen´s fingers twisting in the back of his shirt and the fact that he was pulling Jared impossiby closer put his mind at rest, though. He buried his face in the crook where Jensen´s neck met shoulder, closing his eyes, and felt Jensen doing the same, warm breath puffing against Jared´s skin. Tears were in Jared´s eyes, threatening to spill. He quickly pressed his cheek to the back of Jensen´s head, the soft hair tickling his skin. Jensen´s breath was coming in shudders, as if he was holding back tears himself, the rest of his body stock still. Jared could feel every spot where they were touching, Jensen´s warmth seeping through his clothes. Jared feared that the second he let go this warmth would be gone and he would never truly feel warm again. Jensen lifted his head a little, nose brushing along the shell of Jared´s ear. »Promise me«, he whispered so quietly that Jared almost missed it, the words choked up, like it hurt him to say them. »Promise me the same you promised all those years ago. Please, Jared Tristan.«

Jared nodded into Jensen´s skin, mumbling his response. »I promise.«

» _Khána in_ , thank you«, Jensen smiled, a sad bitter sweet smile and the feeling that Jared had felt the last time he had said good bye to Jensen, wasn´t there. There was no hope, only the certainty that this was their final farewell. The touch of Jensen´s soft lips to his temple startled him, it was quick and faint, like a brother would kiss a brother and it broke his heart.

They broke apart reluctantly, one last look into the others eyes before Jared looked away, taking a step back. » _Therò thanén«_ Jared said. _Take care._ He closed his eyes, waiting for Jensen´s fist to connect with his jaw. It never came.

»Oh fuck you.« It was Genevieve´s voice that brought him back to reality. »Liar«, she spat before stalking off. Jared looked at Jensen who mirrored his terrified expression. Before they could break from their petrified state Genevieve returned, a package in hand similar to Jensen´s.

»It´s not much«, she growled. »More than you deserve anyway. You have a day. Get as far away as possible. God I am so stupid, I knew he was more to you than a brother. It´s in your eyes. You never looked at me like that«, she muttered as she handed Jared the package, eyes filled with unshed tears that she held back. »Run, boy. Run.« She kissed him on the cheek, standing on her tiptoes. She tried to smile, but it came out twisted and wrong, the only time Jared saw her not being able to put on a proper mask. Jared´s eyes widened as he realized what she meant.

»Thank you, Mylady.« He bowed his head.

He looked over to Jensen who had watched their exchange with a closed off expression on his face.

»Let´s go, my friend«, Jared glanced at Genevieve one last time, taking Jensen´s hand and pulling him towards the door leading to their freedom.

 


	3. Chapter 3

They made their way quickly over to the edge of the forest, running the short distance as quietly as they could. Jared tugged Jensen along, knowing by heart where to go to next. Soon they reached the small river they had been running towards. They took off their shoes, rolled up their pants and went ankle deep into the cold water. As Jared turned to continue Jensen stopped him. »Let´s go up stream.« And they did. They walked until he couldn´t feel the stones digging into the soles of his feet, until they were numb with the coldness of the water. They were deep in the woods then and the golden sunlight streaming through the leaves made it seem like it was early evening. They left the river, crossing it and finding a small space between a few trees perfect for them to lie down. Jensen lit a fire as Jared prepared a makeshift bed with the two blankets they had. They were both exhausted as they lay down. Jared fell asleep quickly, a dreamless slumber in the first night as a free man in over two decades. Despite his exhaustion Jensen sat by the fire, watching the night. Watching out for them. The next morning they would continue their journey south, changing to west by the third or fourth day, depending on how fast they were.

 

The further they got, the more relaxed they were. They had been careful not to leave any foot prints and other traces in the first few days. Now they believed they had gotten far enough, that their chances of being caught were slim enough.

One time Jared slipped on a rock, falling down and came face to face with a mortified frog. Jared felt the laughter bubbling up in his throat, the sound almost foreign to him as it came out. Jensen turned, looking at him wide eyed and concerned, causing Jared to laugh even harder as the frog croaked disapprovingly and hopped away. It didn´t take long for Jensen to join in, his careful quiet laugh joining Jared´s booming one and growing more confident by the second.

 

»Have you ever heard the story of the Moon River Girl?«, Jared asked Jensen one night at the campfire as they lay there and watched the stars.

Jensen shook his head No.

Jared cleared his throat and started talking.

»My mother used to tell me the story when I couldn´t sleep, back when I was five or six summers old. Let´s see if I can remember...

Once upon a time, before the Breaker split the continent into the isles by stomping his foot, there were only the stars to guide the people through the night. The first Ethrion, the first bringer of light, a young girl, no older that ten summers by body already had a century old soul. She was so powerful that she could walk on the starlight that sent spots on the waves of the ocean each night.

And she would, she would dance over the spots, twirling on the silver cast across the water. One night the stars united to form a path of silver white for her to walk upon, but she went too far and she drowned in the light of the stars. Her body wasn´t strong enough, but her soul lived on.

It ascended to the skies. Now every night she shines her light down to earth as the moon, guiding us through darkness. And every night she casts a path on the ocean, hoping someone dares to walk it.«

He turned to look at Jensen. Jensen´s eyes were shiny with tears in the light of the campfire.

»That is just heartbreaking«, he rasped, voice clogged. »Don´t you have any happy stories to tell?«

Jared thought about that for a moment. »Maybe.«

»Maybe is not good enough«, Jensen mumbled.

»Quite possibly yes then«, Jared rephrased. »Once upon a time, there was a boy. This boy loved to laugh, but life did not want to give him a reason to. At eight summers he saw his family slaughtered, but he had no time to grieve. He was sent to the mines where he worked until he grew too tall. He was twelve summers when he was sold on the market for the same price you pay for an apple.«

»Now that is just as depressing«, Jensen cut in.

Jared looked over to Jensen, pouting for effect. »Well, as it turns out you won´t let me get to the happy part.« Jensen smiled and rolled his eyes, tugging on Jared´s arm to pillow his head on it: »Go on then.«

»The boy was dragged all over the isles, sold over and over again, no one wanted him. All these years you only heard him laugh twice. One time his owner heard him. The boy wasn´t able to move without hurting in the next days. But he kept quiet, wouldn´t make a sound.«

Jared felt Jensen move, sliding a hand over his torso until his fingertips rested above Jared´s beating heart. Jared put his own fingers atop Jensen´s, lazily twining them. For some reason he never had a problem with Jensen touching him. It had surprised him at first, because he had never really like people touching him. But with Jensen it was...natural.

»One night the boy heard a voice. The voice coaxed him out of his shell and for once the boy let himself believe that there was hope. He had been so close to giving up, but that voice... He never forgot the sound of that voice. It would take years until he heard it again. Until that day he did not laugh. He almost felt like he had forgotton how to. Jensen, I have laughed more with you in the past days than I have in almost twenty years. You saved my life, I am just returning the favor.«

He turned his head to the side, burying his nose in the crook where shoulder met neck and mumbled the next words into Jensen´s skin. »Happy enough for you?«

Jensen turned his head aswell, so they were cheek to cheek, murmuring his reply right into Jared´s ear. »Yeah... I think so.«

They both lay there for a moment, the only sounds the crackling fire and their breathing interlaced with the sounds of the living forest. Then Jensen spoke, voice strained, like the words were fighting against being spoken out loud.

»Jaybird, I remember a boy. There was a boy, he was tall and gangly and he looked both so incredibly young and already too old for his age, I saw him one day, must have been sixteen years ago or so, down at the east port of Naruba. They sold him for a few coins, not many, not... I would have been able to buy him, but I couldn´t risk getting caught. They send me there to spy on the current tradings, trying find out how many slaves there were and I saw him. His eyes were what struck me the most. They were fox like, tilted. And so beautiful. You could see that he wasn´t broken, that he was still in there and I wanted to buy him so bad. I wanted him to be free while he still had a chance. I don´t think he saw me though. You didn´t see me that day, Jaybird, did you?«

Jensen looked at Jared after he had finished, seeking the answer in Jared´s eyes.

»You know«, Jared said after swallowing past the lump in his throat. »Mother used to talk about people like us. The ones destiny can´t decide wether to pull apart or bring together. I never thought I would be one of them.«

Jensen lifted his hand to stroke his fingertips across Jared´s cheek, like he had done so many times before, tangling his fingers in Jared´s curls, which had gotten longer and longer over the past weeks, already reaching his ears. It was a gesture that Jensen had often used to reassure Jared, to show him he was there.

The pads of his fingers caught on the shell of Jared´s ear, tracing it, touch feathery light.

»Jensen?«, Jared almost whispered after a few moments of listening to the other breathing.

»Mhhm?«, Jensen replied, already half asleep.

»Why do you call me Jaybird?«

Jensen didn´t answer for such a long time Jared thought he had fallen asleep. When he spoke, his voice both a little sad and filled with a smile.

»Because you were like a caged bird when I met you. You need to spread your wings, fly away. You should be free. And like a small bird you were easily excited but I had to win your trust. You... I don´t know, you just remind me of a small bird sometimes«, he finished.

»I like it«, Jared murmured, biting his lip a little, looking at Jensen who blinked at him groggily, a slow smile spreading on his lips. »M glad. Gnight, Jaybird.«

»Night, Jen.«

For the first time they both fell asleep together, not one of them out taking the first watch as the other slept. They lay there, warmth of the other sourrounding them, scent comforting and skin touching. There was nothing sexual about it, only the feeling of safety in a loved one´s arms. It was something both of them hadn´t felt in a long time.

 

They woke up with Jared lying half on his stomach, head crooked to the side, Jensen´s arm flung across his back and warm breath ghosting across his neck where Jensen had practically hid himself in Jared´s mop of hair. Their legs were entangled, Jensen´s knee painfully digging into Jared´s thigh. Jared was the first to wake up, Jensen following soon after. Eyes were slowely blinking open, still drowsey from sleep.

»Morning«, Jensen grumpled, voice rough. »Ning«, Jared replied, propping himself up on his elbows, causing Jensen´s arm to slide down his side, across the ribs. He laughed at the tickling sensation.

»I´ll never get tired of hearing this sound«, Jensen smiled, purposefully repeating the move, causing Jared to giggle and huff.

»Oh no, don´t you dare!«

But Jensen did, tickling Jared mercilessly, relishing in the loud booming laughter.

The both ended up in a breathless heap, laughter lines crinkling around Jensen´s eyes and Jared´s dimples carved deep into his cheeks.

Jensen´s expression changed as he looked at Jared, his smile dimmed, became calmer, more quiet. There was this longing in his eyes again, something Jared couldn´t put his finger on. He wanted nothing more than to lean up and kiss it away, replace the longing with an entirely different kind of want. He didn´t think he should though. Jensen pushed off, turning to pack up their things, tossing some dried fruit over to Jared.

»Eat up, we got a long way to go, Jaybird.«

 

Over the next days they fell into a pattern. Every night when they lay down to sleep one would lie down a little too close so they were always touching. One morning they woke up with Jared wrapped around Jensen´s arm like an octopus, another time Jensen had somehow managed to crawl halfway over Jared´s torso, his shoulder right beneath Jared´s chin. Every time when they woke up to find themselves in such a position they would laugh and not mention it again.

One night Jared woke up because he was missing Jensen´s body heat beside him. Jensen was crouched down by the fire, gaze lost in the flames.

Jared rolled over and sat up, one look at his friend enough to know what kept him up. Jared was no stranger to nightmares, even though they weren´t as frequent since he spent time with Jensen.

»You want to talk about it?«, he asked quietly, careful, not interested in scaring his friend.

Jensen shook his head. Jared didn´t get up to move closer, letting Jensen keep the distance. He watched Jensen bite his bottom lip before speaking.

»You see«, Jensen murmured. »I would do anything to just forget. Sometimes.«

He extended his right arm, turning it so his palm was facing upwards. Only he couldn´t complete the move, stopping when his palm was about a third facing up.

»I can´t turn it more than this since my owner decided my arm was too skilled in combat. That was after I had ran for the first time.

He broke my arm in two places and chained me in the court for everyone to see. If someone gave me food they were beaten. He starved me for a week and made sure my arm didn´t heal properly.«

Jensen spoke to the flames, not able to look at Jared.

»I survived. I seemingly always do. But now...

When the dreams come, I can cope with the one being hurt being me.

But now I see you. I see you having to endure everything they did to me and I can´t. I can´t take it.«

Jared did get up then, carefully moving over to his friend, sitting down beside him, not touching but close enough for him to feel his presence.

»I come from an old family, before the war they were one of the most well known , most respected. I learned about honor before I could walk. And the day the army came I turned around, left my honor and my pride and ran. I ran as fast and far as I could and I survived. I betrayed everything I had known until that day and sometimes I ask myself if I chose right.«

Jared opened his mouth to answer, but Jensen held up his hand to stop him.

»Once I tried riling my owner up enough to kill me, but he just locked me away in the dark.

And then I met you. And I remember trying to convince you not to give up. I remember feeling like a hypocrite, telling you all that and being there because I had given up. Because I told you not to give up I knew I had to do the same. I ran for the first time a day after I met you. I ran a second time three months later, when my arm was healed. I don´t remember what they did to me then. I just ran as soon as I could and I made it. They didn´t catch me for years and when they finally did, where did I end up?

Right infront of you.«

Jensen laughed, the sound hollow. He showed Jared his arm again, this time pointing to a scar spanning one half of his wrist. »I cut my wrist the night I met you. Everytime I want to give up it reminds me that you didn´t until you touched me.«

Jensen turned his head, expression honest and open, emotions fighting on his face. Involuntarily Jared´s gaze dropped down to Jensen´s lips. The space between them was small, so small, so easy to close. Just one move and Jared could express everything he couldn´t put into words with one simple touch, try to wipe all that pain from Jensen´s face and convince him that yes, he had made the right choice.

But Jensen turned his head away again before he could do it, staring into the flames again.

»I know I made the right choice, I know it. It´s just that sometimes, with these dreams, it´s so easy to think otherwise«, Jensen´s voice faded with each word and Jared couldn´t sit by and watch anymore. He put his arm around Jensen´s shoulder, pulling him into his side as Jensen started crying.

Jensen curled in on himself and Jared kept him in his arms protectively, shushing him quietly and stroking his hair.

Jared wanted to cry with him but found that he couldn´t, feeling too empty and too filled up inside to find tears. It dawned to him what had been lurking in his mind for so long. That he would love Jensen in any way he would let him.

That night they fell asleep embracing eachother, arms wound tight around them, a warm cocoon, tucked away from the world, like lovers do.

 

They were climbing up a stone cliff when Jared felt a sharp pain rip through his palm. He hissed, turning to look at his hands, fingers of the other one digging into the rock to keep him steady. Jensen was a few steps ahead of him, already climbing over the edge.

Jared´s palm was sliced open, bleeding and hurting. Jared cursed at the sight of the open flesh.

»Jay, what happened?«, came Jensen´s voice from above him, where he was now lying on his stomach, reaching down to Jared.

»I cut my hand«, Jared replied, fingers of his other hand starting to cramp.

»I´ll pull you up and we take a look at it, okay?«, Jensen urged him on.

Jared gathered his strength, cradeling his injured hand close to his body, muscles tensing as he pulled himself up high enough for Jensen to grip his forearm, carefully ignoring his bleeding palm.

With combined effort they got Jared up. Sitting down Jared took a closer look at his hand. Luckily there was no dirt in the cut that reached diagonally from his thumb across the entire palm.

»Here«, Jensen handed him a clean cloth from his pack. Jared thanked him and wiped the blood that ran down his wrist away, cleaning it as best as he could. He tied the cloth around it when he was finished and got up. »Let´s go on then«, he muttered, turning to the path ahead.

 

Jensen was a step ahead of Jared and missed the root sticking out from the ground. He fell with a small yip, going down to his knees, hands catching his fall. He breathed in sharply as he lifted a hand to wave to Jared that he was ok when he crouched down in front of him.

»No, Jensen, you´re hurt! Now let me see!«, Jared urged the older man, already taking his hand, own injury momentarily forgotten. His cut open palm slid over Jensen´s wrist to push back the shirt sleeve, smearing blood all across the silver cuff.

Jensen closed his eyes as Jared´s careful fingers touched his wrist, assessing the damage on his right arm, from the looks of it a minor sprain. He swallowed hard, then managed to choke out: »Jared, stop.«

Jared´s eyes shot up. »Where is it hurting? What kind of pain? Jensen?«, he rushed out, seeing the tears on his friends cheeks, his breathing ragged.

Jensen´s eyes opened, serene bright emerald locking with concerned hazel.

»Look around Jared«, he said as a slow smile spread across his face.

Reluctantly Jared tore his gaze away from Jensen to find himself in the middle of a bed of growing flowers.

Where seconds ago had been only moss and grass and a few trees now ferns blossomed. Tiny acorns reaching up. Mushrooms reaching for the light. It was chaotic. And it was pure creation of life.

He looked back at Jensen who had gathered a little earth and dirt in his hands and now watched a tiny seedling grow to a small oak in amazement. His face was bright with happiness, tears staining his cheeks, a smile splitting them almost in half and his eyes were sparkling in the dim light of the forest.

»Jensen?«, Jared asked slowly, not able to comprehend what he was seeing.

Jensen carefully set aside the tiny plant, gentle, caring, before picking up something shiny from the ground.

»Look at this!«, he exclaimed, placing it in Jared´s palm. »Look at it.«

And Jared did. In his palm lay half of Jensen´s cuff, edges frayed, like some acid had eaten its way through. He was still staring at the broken metal in amazement as he felt Jensen´s lips on his forehead, his hand at the back of his head. Jared gazed up then, tilting his head a little upwards and Jensen quickly pressed a kiss to his lips that left them tingling and Jared wanting more. But Jensen was already up again, twisting and watching vines grow and engulf him. And Jared could only sit there and watch, asking himself how this could possibly be real.

 

»Jensen?«, Jared said quietly, watching Jensen sit by the fire, turning the broken silver cuff in his hand over and over, sometimes rubbing at the white stripe of skin the cuff had left behind. »Mh?«, was the mumbled reply, Jensen´s gaze still fixed on his fingertips tracing the torn edge.

»I need to ask you something«, Jared moved to sit down beside Jensen, watching as the fire light danced over his features, making them look like nothing Jared had ever seen before. Jensen did not stray from his deep thoughts, but tilted his head towards Jared, as if telling him that he was going to listen, despite not seeming like he payed a lot of attention.

»Why did you kiss me?«

The question hung between them for a second and Jared was just about going to give up and just lay down to sleep but then Jensen spoke, quiet, with a tint of regret and fear in it.

»I´m sorry. I got carried away, I... I wanted to and sometimes I forget you weren´t a free man for most of your life. And even then... I should have asked for your consent and not just... I´m sorry.«

»Then ask me«, Jared told him, surprised that this was the issue Jensen apparently had trouble with. Jensen looked at him then, confusion furrowing his brows. »What?« »I said, ask me«, there was the hint of a smile on Jared´s lips.

Jensen watched him then, like he could believe what Jared had just told him. As if he was the one dreaming. He asked then, shy and careful. »Can I kiss you?«

»Yes«, Jared nodded. »Please.«

Jensen leaned in hesitantly so Jared took matters into his own hands, closing the gap between them.

Jensen´s lips were slightly open as they met his, the simple touch as intoxicating as Jared remembered. He felt the plush swell of Jensen´s bottom lip and couldn´t help but gently nip at it.

This was met with a quiet whimper from Jensen, who traced his fingertips along Jared´s jaw line.

Jared slid his tongue over the slightly rough texture of Jensen´s lip before catching it between his teeth, worrying it. This apparently tipped Jensen over the edge, who pushed his fingers into Jared´s shaggy hair, gripping tight and pulling him closer, slanting their mouths together.

The kiss that before could have been described as nothing more than a tease turned frantic, both men pushing against eachother, their emotions breaking free.

Jared didn´t know how he had ended up on his back, Jensen half on top of him. But it didn´t matter, not with Jensen´s tongue teasing his, not with his thigh dragging deliciously over Jared´s hard cock. It didn´t matter with Jensen kissing him like his life depended on it. Jared reciprocated as best as he could, hips bucking on their own accord.

One of Jensen´s hands left his hair as he turned Jared´s head to the side to kiss and suck down his neck, trailing it down over his side and back up his chest as Jared got his fingers under Jensen´s shirt, both of them moaning at the touch of skin on skin.

Despite feeling as if someone had shut off his brain and lit every single nerve in his body on fire, Jared remembered not to touch Jensen´s back, the scar tissue too fresh.

Soon they were both a panting, writhing mess, moving in tune with each other, needing.

Then Jensen did one little wicked twist with his hips and Jared fell to pieces. He felt the hot come shooting from his dick, staining his pants. He didn´t care. Every cell of his body felt alive, his mind slowly coming down from his high. He looked at Jensen, who was still sprawled half on top of him, hips working in short aborted thrusts, two, three times, before a shudder went through his body accompanied by a gasp. Green eyes locked on hazel, pupils blown wide.

»Gods«, Jensen rasped, out of breath. Jared nodded, not knowing how to describe what he felt. This was not exactly what he had thought would happen. He had been counting on a goodnight kiss and that was it. Not that he was complaining.

 

They both just lay there for a moment, relishing in their post orgasmic bliss. Jensen got up first, Jared almost mewling at the loss of contact. Jensen walked over to his small pack, rummaging through it, before pulling out a simple cloth, tossing it to Jared. »Clean up.«

Jared took it, making quick work at cleaning his pants before the come dried.

Jensen came back to him after he had finished, their sharpest knife in hand.

Jared looked at him questioningly. »I have a theory and I would like to test it«, Jensen explained, sitting down opposite Jared.

»Ok, what theory?«, Jared asked, brows furrowed. This was definitely not how he had imagined the aftermath of their make out and dry humping session, but fine.

»I´d rather just test it, in case it doesn´t work it won´t be too disappointing«, Jensen tried to dodge the question. »Trust me?«, he leaned forward a little, eyes sliding down to Jared´s pink, almost bitten raw lips, like he was asking permission to kiss him again. »Yes«, Jared answered, to both questions. Jensen gave him a quick peck, like the one in the woods, then gripped the knife tighter in his right hand.

»Well, here goes nothing«, he muttered quietly, gritting his teeth as he cut his palm open. He dropped the knife, taking Jared´s arm instead and pulling his wrist towards him.

He pressed his slit open palm to the cuff on Jared´s wrist, eyes flitting between Jared´s and their hands.

Jared was still confused and was just about to open his mouth as he felt something strange. Then everything went dark.

 

Jared woke up because every single bone in his body was burning. He felt as if his blood was boiling, yet his skin freezing. His breath was coming in quick, short pants, every single one a stab in his chest and there was a dull thumping pain in his skull. It took him a long time to register that his head was cushioned in Jensen´s lap and that he was carefully brushing across his forehead and talking to him. It took even longer for him to make out what Jensen was saying. »Jay, how do you feel?«

»Terrible, too hot, too cold«, Jared croaked out. »Good«, Jensen smiled. »How is that good?«, Jared asked, every single word fighting it´s way out of his throat.

»Jay, it´s raining«, Jensen answered. It was raining, big fat drops that soaked the earth. It clung to his clothes sticking them to his body.

»Jared«, Jensen said, leaning in closer so Jared could understand him better. »What you are feeling is pure energy bursting through your body for the first time. Try to rest, I will explain later.« Even though Jared didn´t want to, he drifted back into unconsciousness quickly. His muscles were spasming every now and then, even moving a single finger was connected to an unbearable pain.

 

The next time Jared woke up the rain was falling softer. His head was still in Jensen´s lap, the pain in his body still present, but not as harsh as before.

»Jay?«, that was Jensen´s voice in his ear. Jared tried moving a little in response and the pain flared up bright in his bones. He let out a sharp hiss, blinking his eyes open.

»Shh«, Jensen put a hand to his chest. »Don´t move yet.«

He brushed one of Jared´s wet bangs off his forehead before continuing. »Jay, we broke your cuff. We did it. You´re free«, he smiled, like he couldn´t believe the words himself. »This means that you can access your powers. When you broke my cuff I felt so much energy flood back into my body as I reconnected with what I had been missing. It was overwhelming. But I had a chance to develop my powers and get used to them for eleven years. I have been cut off for fourteen. You never had the chance to connect with your element and you have been cut off for over twenty years. Jared, I can´t imagine what you go through right now. All that energy must be bursting through you. It tries to build up the connection you missed for two decades in a few hours. I mean that has to hurt.« He paused, turning his head up to the falling rain.

Jared was still catching up with what Jensen had said, mind still clouded with pain when Jensen spoke again.

»You are the reason it´s raining, Jared. Remember how everything started to grow around me? It´s the same with you! You needed an outlet for your overwhelming emotions and subconsciously caused a monsoon in the middle of a desert.« Jensen laughed, smile playing on his lips. »Judging by the way it falls you feel a little better now?«

»Am I dead?«, Jared asked, Jensen´s words suddenly making sense.

»No. Jay, you are alive. So incredibly alive.«

 

It took a few more hours until Jared felt well enough to get up, the pain having subsided apart from an ache deep in his bones. The rain had stopped falling by then.

»Eat«, Jensen pointed at the array of food beside Jared on the soaked ground. Jared eyed it blearily.

»Don´t worry, it´s completely safe«, Jensen smiled, getting up to get some water.

»How long was I out?«, Jared mumbled, fog in his brain clearing.

»About a day«, Jensen answered. »How´re you feeling now?«

Jared thought about it for a second.

»Weird.«

Jensen raised an eyebrow.

»Different«, Jared elaborated, accepting the offered water and taking a sip.

The cool liquid soothed his sore throat, sending a relaxing feeling through his tired muscles. That was when Jensen´s answer made its way to his brain.

»A day??? Jensen, we need to-« Jensen put his hand on his chest as Jared tried to get up on wobbly legs.

»Don´t. Calm down. First we´ll eat, then we´ll talk and then we can move.« His voice was so steady and sure that it almost put all the questions on Jared´s mind at ease. Almost.

He kept his mouth shut though, picking up some of the offered vegetables, raising his brow at Jensen.

»What´s this?«

»Midnight peppers.«

»They´re purple.«

»And tasty«, Jensen winked.

Jared raised his eyebrow, taking a tentative bite. The midnight pepper wasn´t as bad as he had feared but it wouldn´t be his favorite food either.

»So what are we gonna do now?«, he asked while chewing the slightly gooey plant.

Jensen shrugged. »Still try make it to the port, I guess? If you want I can try teach you a thing or two on the way there. Once where there we can fight our way to one of the bases. If you want.«

»Sounds good to me«, Jared smiled. Jensen bit back a grin.

Jared´s smile faltered. »What?«

»Nothing, ´s just... your hair is all messed up, you look like shit and have midnight pepper stuck in your teeth and Ijustwouldreallyliketokissyouagain«, the last words were mumbled together, falling and tripping over eachother.

Jared laughed as he saw the tips of Jensen´s ears pinkening, the blush creeping over his cheeks. Jensen averted his eyes, clearly thinking that Jared was laughing at him, while it actually was that Jared just couldn´t believe it.

The pain must have meddled with his brain, because there was no chance that all this could be real.

His powers were unlocked and he was out here with Jensen, kind, georgeous Jensen, who seemed to like Jared as much as Jared liked him.

»Just let me clean my teeth first«, he muttered, looking around for his bag.

 

They shared a short, simple kiss before packing up their things, the blush staying on the tips of Jensen´s ears while Jared´s dimples seemed to be permanently carved into his cheeks. They each stole shy glances at eachother, playing coy when their eyes locked and bursting out laughing quickly after.

It was the most carefree Jared had felt since he was a child.

 


	4. Chapter 4

It took them three more days to get to the port. On the way there Jensen taught Jared some basics on how to control his gift, noting that he was more emotion than rationality driven in his approach and that he was a fast learner.

They shared a few kisses, never lingering too long and slept curled around eachother, Jared often falling asleep as the little spoon and waking up sprawled all over Jensen.

Jensen didn´t seem to mind. Neither had another nightmare.

The closer they got to the port the quieter Jensen got. Jared felt a faint sense of dread pool in his gut. Jensen hadn´t told him how exactly they would proceed once they reached the port and always diverted the conversation when Jared tried to coax it out of him.

It worried him.

 

It was a beautiful morning when they reached the harbor and the attached market. They could already hear the buzzing from the market place before they could see it and Jared´s fingers gripped tighter on Jensen´s hand, who stroked his thumb over Jared´s knuckles in a soothing gesture. He didn´t say anything though.

Before they stepped on the market, Jensen stopped Jared for a second. »Do you trust me?«, he asked, voice steady, jaw set in a tense line. Jared nodded: »Of course I do, but why-«

»I promise I won´t let anything happen to you. I won´t. I can´t tell you more, the lesser you know the better you are off. So just promise me you trust me«, Jensen urged, the slightest bit of worry creeping into his voice.

»I promise«, Jared answered, brows furrowed in confusion at Jensen´s cryptic behavior.

»Good«, Jensen whispered, leaning in and placing a kiss on Jared´s lips. »Stay close, don´t talk, I mean it, don´t say a word and just go along with what I do and you will be safe. I know what I am doing.«

Jared opened his mouth to reply, but Jensen was already on the move.

He followed Jensen through the market, along rows and rows of all kinds of goods.

He spotted a guard not far away and so did Jensen. He shot Jared a quick smile. Then he leaned down and took one of the fruits lying on the vendor´s table, tossing it to Jared who reflexively caught it. He proceeded tossing two more to Jared while dodging the vendor who was shouting already for the guard. The second the guard started moving Jensen dropped the fruit he was holding, tugged on Jared´s hand and smirked. »Now run.«

And they did. Jensen always a little ahead of Jared, pushing over and throwing things. The guard gained and the brawl they had caused was enough to attract the attention of the other guards.

Within moments the two were encircled.

Jared got ready to fight, even to use his powers, though they were not really controllable yet. But Jensen´s quiet, steady voice stopped him. »Don´t. Trust me. You will be safe.«

That voice distracted him enough for one of the guards to come closer. Jared doubled over at the fist hitting his solar plexus.

The moment he felt the silver handcuffs snap around his wrist his entire world went numb. He couldn´t feel the ocean anymore, his senses dull and slow. It was terrifying. Jared would have panicked if it weren´t for Jensen´s presence beside him.

 

They were dragged to the main building of the city guards and tossed into an office like room, with a desk, some drawers and a man standing right behind said desk.

The man was shorter than Jensen, with long brown hair and fierce blue eyes. Something about him struck Jared as odd, but he couldn´t put a finger on the why and how.

»That would be all«, the man said to the two guards that had escorted Jared and Jensen inside. His voice was gruff, stern and tinged with a barely there northern accent.

The two guards left, closing the thick wooden door behind them. Jared briefly considered trying to make a run for it but again Jensen´s voice stopped him.

»Now what have we here?«, the man smirked, walking towards them. Jared eyed him with disgust in his eyes, as he stood before him, disgust that only increased as the man eyed Jensen up and down, with a look that resembled the one of the slave traders all too well. »Never thought I would see you again, Jenny.« Jensen just stood there, staring down at the man in front of him: »Kane.«

Jared was almost about to leap and try strangle Jensen´s former owner with his handcuffs as the man looked back down to Jensen´s crotch with curiosity. Then Jared noticed Jensen´s hands moving, forming shapes and gestures, Kane´s hands responding shortly after Jensen´s stopped for a second. They exchanged a look Jared couldn´t read.

Something like regret flickered across Kane's face right before he hit Jensen square on the jaw. Jared could see his lip splitting and hadn´t it been for Jensen mouthing 'It´s ok' to him he would´ve tried ending Kane right then.

Kane grabbing Jensen´s face to look at him. Then he growled: »Where are they?«

»I don´t know what you are talking about«, Jensen replied, lips curling into a snarl that revealed blood stained teeth.

»Yeah right«, Kane hit Jensen in the stomach, causing him to double over, his breathing becoming laboured. Kane roughly yanked his head up, fingers clenched in short hair.

»Where are they?«, his voice grew louder, Jared was sure that the guards positioned outside would hear them now. »I don´t know«, Jensen replied again, voice still steady, but breathing erratic.

»Then I just have to ask the other«, Kane smiled, pushing Jensen´s head down, turning to Jared. He had his fist already drawn back when Jensen spoke again. »He won´t tell you anything. He can´t. He´s a bloody mute. Always has been.«

Kane turned back to Jensen, eyes narrowed. »Is that so? Well, then I don´t have another choice but to...«, he trailed off, tone predatory. He did not move closer to Jensen, just eyed him from where he was still in Jared´s personal space. Jared felt like there was a bigger picture he was missing, something right in front of him, invisible but utterly important.

Then Jensen screamed. It was a gut wrenching scream, chilling Jared down to the bone. He could only imagine when Jensen had learned to scream like that.

But what just didn´t fit was how his hands kept moving while he sobbed out »I will tell you everything I know, just, please, don´t hurt him«, voice hoarse and broken, yet body relaxed and calm.

Kane´s face changed expressions from puzzled to bedazzled to genuinely happy all while he yelled out questions, that Jensen always answered with names Jared had never heard before, voice sounding worse by the second. Their hands didn´t stop moving.

When they finally stopped, Jared didn´t think he could take anymore of hearing Jensen hurting like this, even though he wasn´t being tortured for all Jared knew. He couldn´t make sense of it all.

Kane nodded at Jensen, going over to one of the drawers, pulling out two silver cuffs. He snapped one close around Jensen´s wrist, who did not resist at all.

Jensen breathed heavily, as if he was fighting through tremendous pain and Jared struggled at first put Kane simply pulled harder on his wrist. Jared looked over to Jensen who had a pleading look on his face. Seconds later his new silver cuff was in place.

»Guards!«, Kane roared and within the blink of an eye the two guards were back.

»They shall be executed at sunrise, this one«, he pointed at Jensen, »shall be buried alive and this one«, he pointed at Jared, »drowned in the ocean. Lock them up for now.«

Jared stared at Kane in fear as they were dragged down into the small dungeon beneath the building.

They were thrown into the same cell after being given a few sips of stale water, but their handcuffs weren´t taken off.

The guards left with the torch, leaving them in darkness as Jared sank into unconsciousness, hearing Jensen spit out on the ground.

 

As he drifted back, it took him a second to orient himself in the dark. Jensen was breathing close to him. »Jensen, what did you do?«, Jared spoke quietly, he felt numb, like he would not be able to outrun his death sentence this time. He felt defeated.

»I did what I needed to. Tomorrow we will be free men who don´t have to run«, Jensen answered, voice sure yet exhausted. Jared´s composure broke then. He surged toward to where he knew Jensen sat slumped forward. He blindly reached for something to hold on to and twisted his hands in Jensen´s shirt. »Jensen, they will execute us at sun rise. We will die and we will die owned«, he snarled, anger fueled with despair taking over.

»No they won´t«, Jensen said, calmly prying Jared´s fingers from his shirt. »You can´t drown water. They will throw you into the ocean and all you have to do is stay under until someone comes for you. And someone will come. Same as someone will dig me up. It´s your gift related immunity. You can´t drown water.« Jensen repeated to make his point clearer, even though it didn´t help Jared. He had heard of gift related immunities. Gifted with the power of air couldn´t be forcibly suffocated, gifted of fire never burned to death.

»I know that, Jensen!«, Jared pulled his hands back. »That´s why they cuff you, that is why they put a bullet in you just to be sure.« He had seen it once. The public execution of two young slaves that had made the mistake to disobey their owners orders.

»That´s why I will shoot you. The same reason your cuffs are made of polished iron aced with chrome«, the gruff words from Kane made Jared jump. He hadn´t heard the man approaching and now every single muscle in his body was set on escaping.

A warm flame flared up outside the cell, there was some rattling and the cell door swung open.

Kane stepped in, the flame cradled in his palm. »I am sorry it took me so long. Guards just wouldn´t pass out. So I helped a bit.«

Jared stared at the flame. Kane carefully set it down as he sat crosslegged opposite Jensen and Jared. He made a small motion with his fingers causing the flame to grow into a little campfire flame, bright and warm enough to bathe all three of them in light.

»What the fuck is going on here?«

»Asking the important questions I see«, Kane smirked.

Jensen rolled his eyes. »They drugged him, I didn´t have the time yet. Chris, would you do the honors?«

»Sure«, Chris smirked, tossing some keys over to Jensen who unlocked first Jared´s and then his own cuffs.

»So Jenny-bean over here has been with the rebels, but I think you already knew that.« Jared nodded. »Well, I have been too. I was the one who got him into that mess in the first place. Anyways, as you might have guessed I am gifted with fire. Other than some unlucky basterds I managed to hide it pretty well for quite some years. I use my position to get any gifted that falls into the city guard´s hands, and believe me there are more than you think, out of the system. To the government you will be dead. You can chose to either get a new identity, which is possible but risky, or join us. Your choice. Chad will get you-« »Who is Chad?«, Jared cut in. Jensen snickered, rubbing his own wrists to get the blood flowing again. »Chad is...«, Chris started, only to be interrupted by Jensen. »A friend? Coworker? _Lover?_ Chrissian, c´mon, tell me, what did I miss? Does he still hate his name? Which one of you manned up while I was gone?«

There was a small spark of envy deep in Jared´s gut at seeing the two men banter so easily with eachother. But on the other hand his heart did a little tap tap tap at seeing Jensen so alive. It was mesmerizing. He thought that they had forgotten him as Jensen reached for his hands without looking away from Chris, still talking. His gentle fingers startled Jared as they massaged his sore wrists with care. His envy was forgotten instantly at how apparently Jensen always looked out for him. Even if he seemed not to.

»To answer your question, Chad is a good friend of mine, who also happens to be one of our most skilled smugglers. He will go get you while I dig up Jensen tomorrow afternoon. You will then be brought to one of our safe houses and from there to our main camp on Thalor. If you want to, of course«, Chris picked up the conversation again.

 

Jared woke up at the loud screech of the cell door being pushed open and seconds later he was yanked up by two guards, away from Jensen who scrambled to the back of the cell, eyes wide in fear as Kane stepped in, a cruel smile on his face.  
»Rise and shine, there is nothing better than an execution in the morning.« He roughly pulled Jensen upwards, who curled his lips in a snarls as he was put in cuffs once more.

The guards holding Jared cuffed his wrists behind his back and Jared could feel that this time, the shackles were made of iron. He almost let out a sigh of relief.

Both him and Jensen were pushed out the door, up the stairs and out into the morning sun that was hiding behind grey clouds. The air was a little chilly and the town and market just waking up. Soon the sun would be sitting high in the sky, heat beating down onto the people going on with their every day business.

Just not for them.

They were led to the west cliffside, where there was a little strip of grass between forrest and cliff. Even from afar Jared could see the hole they had dug up for Jensen.

A crow sat on a nearby tree, observing the proceedings at the cliff.

»Any last wishes?«, one of the guards mocked over the harsh winds that filled the grey sky.

Jensen just looked at him defiantly, not averting his eyes as he spit on the ground. »None apart from wanting to rip you to pieces, human.« He spat the last word like it was the most disgusting thing he had ever tasted.

Jared looked at him. The last day had shown him how good of an actor Jensen was. And this part was too believable for his own good. Right on cue Chris cut in. »Enough.« He stepped forward, pushing Jensen to the open grave, pulling out his gun and in one swift move pulling the trigger. The shot rang through the air and had Jared not been repeating the words from last night in his head over and over, he would have tried following Jensen into the grave. Jensen fell without grace, simply landing with a dull thud in the dirt a few feet below.

»Now put that dirt back in, I can´t stand to see his face«, Kane growled at the guards, walking over to Jared.

He winked as he pulled the trigger once more. »Night, buttercup.«

The shot rang out and Jared tumbled back like he was expected too. His heart was close to leaping out of his chest as he lost balance, tumbling over the edge, trying to feel the ocean coming closer, twisting his body as not to land head first and feeling the water rise to welcome him. Out of habit he held his breath as he was engulfed by the rising tide, sound swept away and replaced with the dull swoosh of underwater currents.

Taking the first breath was the hardest. He didn´t know what to expect, how it would feel. He hadn´t expected it to feel so painless. The water was tickling his nose but apart from that it was... fine.

Jared opened his eyes, the salt stinging a little. He was surrounded by deep dark blue. It calmed him.

He didn´t know how much time passed until he saw the figure approaching. He could only see vague outlines on the strangers face who grabbed his shoulder and turned him, unlocking the cuffs at his back before they both swam to the surface.

 

»Well, hello there, long time no see«, Jared´s savior snickered the second they both had their heads above the water. Jared blinked the water out of his eyes. He could place the voice and the smirk on the other guys face sealed the deal. »You? Are you kidding me?«, Jared muttered, more to himself than anything else. »Me?«, Mykhal cocked his head to the side as they tread water. »You´re Chad?«, Jared inquired, squinting through the droplets of water running down his face. »How, what?« »And you are still one bright candle«, Mykhal, or Chad, whatever, replied. »Hybrid. Shifter and gifted with air. Now can we continue this conversation somewhere less... wet, maybe?«

»Sure«, Jared mumbled, following Chad through the waves as far as he could tell farther from the shore with every stroke.

 

»Sheppard«, Chad greeted the rather short, stocky man welcoming them on deck. He had dark hair and a gruff beard and fierce eyes. Despite his physical appearance he had an aura around him which demanded respect.

»The other two arrived as well, if you would set sail, Mykhal«, Sheppard spoke, the tone of his voice making it clear it was a command. His voice had something of a purr to it, a deep tremolo that wrapped around his sounds.

»Where is Jensen?«, Jared asked as Chad nodded and went off. He couldn´t spot him anywhere on deck.

»That is the first thing you say? No 'Thank you'?«, Sheppard grumbled before pointing Jared to the back of the deck. »Third door on the left.«

Jared cast his eyes down at the words from Sheppard, rembering his manners. »Thank you«, he replied, nodding towards the man, turning to the appointed direction.

His path led him into the ship. The wooden planks were clean and had a slightly salty smell. Jared felt comforted by the soft creaking of the wood.

He opened the third door on the left and for a moment he thought he had gotten the wrong door until he saw Jensen lying in the bunk.

Beside him sat a woman with auburn hair, gently stroking through his dirty blond strands. She turned her head as she heard the door open.

Jared quickly strode over to her, seeing Jensen´s unconscious form, his face lax and open, head turned to the side.

»Don´t worry, he will wake up soon and I will be gone by then«, she spoke, her voice soft and bright, yet laced with sadness.

»What´s wrong with him?«, Jared asked, eyeing Jensen wearily.

»He swallowed some kind of root that knocked him out. Kane said he did it to convince people that might check that he´s dead when Kane carried him over to the boat. Always so causcious.«

'Except for that time he was caught', Jared thought.

»I´m Danneel, by the way. Ship´s cook«, she smiled at him, the smile not reaching her eyes.

»Jared. Gifted or shifter?«, Jared responded, shifting his focus from Jensen to Danneel who was still petting Jensen´s hair. It looked strangely intimate. A part of Jared didn´t like it. At all.

»I´m a fox«, Danneel said. Silence followed.

A few moments later Danneel got up, looking at Jensen one last time before turning to Jared.

»Don´t tell him I was here, okay?«

Jared nodded. »Take care of him for me, will you?« Jared nodded again, clearing his throat this time. »I promise.«

»Thank you«, Danneel replied, leaving Jared alone with Jensen and quite a few questions.

Jared sat down beside Jensen, feeling his pulse. It was slow. Incredibly slow. But it was steady. Jared pillowed his head on his arms, waiting for Jensen to wake up as the adrenaline drained out of his body, leaving him exhausted.

 

Jensen woke up to see Jared half curled in on himself, sound asleep, snoring softly. It had caught Jensen off guard how quickly he had cared about Jared. Trusted him. He remembered the voice of the boy from all those years ago and sometimes he couldn´t believe that that boy had grown into this incredible man. Somehow Jared had managed to keep himself alive all these years. Jensen admired his ability to survive.

It had sparked something in him, waking his own dormant spirits. A day after his successful escape he had met Chris, who turned out to be a good ally and soon a good friend. He had returned to the rebels, did his best to do his part, even though he felt worthless after losing his gift. His purpose.

As it turned out he was a decent courier. Until the day he had been caught.

His brain had shut off that day. Turned blank.

Later it was Jared who woke him.

Jared with his soft voice and that gentleness in his vowels, inflections still the same when he felt unguarded. Jared.

Who was willing to give up his life for Jensen after knowing him for only a few moments.

What a twisted game the gods were playing. But at least Jared felt the same for him.

In a way the gods were more cruel to Danneel.

Losing your heart to someone who doesn´t know how give theirs in return.

Jared stirred in his sleep, making Jensen snap from his musings.

»Safe _house_. Why we on a ship?«, Jared slurred, turning his head.

Jensen could see his eyes were closed and after a small hiccup Jared was snoring again.

Jensen felt his heart swell with fondness for the man at his side.

Jared deserved to be safe and Jensen would do anything to ensure that he was.

Jared woke up with Jensen studying his features, small smile on his lips.

 

They stood on deck together, leaning against the railing, the wind tusseling Jared´s hair, Jensen´s shoulder brushing his from time to time. Jared closed his eyes, feeling the ocean and the sun shining on his face. Jensen nudged him, startling him.

»Jaybird, look, land in sight«, he smiled.

Jared turned around, looking at the horizon. There was a thin dark line between ocean and sky, barely visible. »You have a good eye«, Jared smirked.

Jensen rolled his eyes, grin tugging at his lips. »We´ve spent so much time at sea, my heart is yearning for some earth beneath my feet and you know it.«

Jared didn´t respond, of course he had noticed how Jensen had gotten more tense over the past days, the separation from his element getting to him. So he just pressed his shoulder to Jensen´s and watched the line thickening and growing closer until he could make out the first shapes. He was fascinated by the coast line. He knew the sharp edges and rough cliffs of his home, but he had never seen something quite like this.

There was a beach, lined with pebbles and stones, yet a beach nonetheless, that gradually transitioned into the green of a forest.

A crow flew over there heads to the shore.

»Chad´s gonna tell them we are coming so they disable the traps«, Jensen remarked as he saw Jared´s gaze following the crow.

Before Jared could answer Sheppard called out to them. »The boat is ready, if you will?«

»Sure«, Jensen quipped, tugging Jared along to the ladder reaching down to the small boat that they would row to shore in. Before stepping it down Jensen took a small bow before Sheppard, nodding his thanks and Jared following suit.

Mike, second in comand, was already sitting in the boat, welcoming them with a little tilt of his head. »You´re gonna row, because I have to row back.«

»Course you do«, Jensen chuckled, taking up the paddles before Jared had a chance to do anything. They changed positions about half way through, finding out that Jared wasn´t even that terrible, course only wobbling a little.

 

»Welcome to Thalor«, Jensen mumbled once they had reached the shoreline. »Thanks Mike.«

»Always a pleasure«, Mike replied. »And Jensen? Give this to Tom, ok?« Mike handed Jensen an envelope, which Jensen accepted and stuffed into one of his pockets. »Will do.«

»Thanks Mike«, Jared chimed in, climbing out of the boat, landing in the ankle deep water.

»No problem. Walk straight ahead, someone will pick you up eventually«, Mike winked, taking hold of the paddles.

Jared turned to the forest, making his way across the beach beside Jensen.

 

They had walked about fifteen minutes when the spotted a man sitting crosslegged on a tree stump, hands folded neatly in his lap and eyes closed. His hair was dark and he wore clothes in browns and deep greens, making him blend in with his surroundings. He opened his eyes, irises shining electric blue.

»I am the welcome comitee, so... welcome«, he said.

»Thanks«, Jared smiled.

»Oh, it´s my pleasure«, the guy grinned back. »I am Misha. And no, Jensen, I don´t have anything better to do then sit around in the woods all day, waiting for long lost friends to return.«

Jared turned his head, looking at Jensen, confused since he hadn´t heard Jensen say anything.

»Mish, cut it out«, Jensen growled. »I hate when you dig into my head.«

Misha rolled his eyes, climbing from his tree stump. »Fine. C´mon, people are awaiting you. Not many but a few. And they of course wanna know how you got rid of the cuffs.« With these words Misha turned and walked further into the woods.

»Is he always like that?«, Jared asked quietly as they followed him.

»Yep. Being able to control time, light and people really messed with his head«, Jensen replied, voice serious.

»I can hear you, remember?«, Misha quipped teasingly from a few feet away.

Jensen laughed.

 

They reached the camp soon after. They could hear it already from afar, people talking, metal clinking against metal, a few shouts here and there. Once there, Jared could feel the energy buzzing from all the people running about, gifted and shifters running their daily routine. What irked him though was that he couldn´t see where all the people seemed to live. At first Jared only saw a few tables standing between the trees, and a hut with a fireplace in front of it, presumably a kitchen, as some people were puttering around. Then he looked up.

Almost the entire camp was set up in the tree tops, platforms and small houses connected by hanging bridges, an intricate pattern over several levels, spanning further than Jared could see. It was fascinating.

Together with Jensen and Misha he climbed one of the ladders leading up to the lowest platform and followed them to a medium sized hut on level two.

 

Jensen linked their pinkies as Misha pushed open the door, leading them inside. The quiet comfort the gesture gave him calmed Jared´s frantic heart beat a little. »Don´t worry, you´ll get used to the height pretty fast«, Jensen mumbled into his ear before they stepped into the hut. There were two women sitting at a table, one blonde, one brunette, talking to eachother.

A silver gray wolf lay curled up in the corner by the door. It lifted its head as they entered.

»May I intoduce you?«, Misha turned to them. »Samantha and Samantha«, he pointed to the two women. »Logistics, training for combat and troop oversight, call me Sam«, added the brunette Samantha.

»And Tahmoh, head of the guards and maintance«, Misha pointed at the wolf, who yawned and lazily shifted into his human form.

»Let´s make it quick, ok?«, Tahmoh was soft spoken, his voice reminding Jared of silk, calm and strong and immediately demanding respect.

Misha shook his head. »Duh.«

 

The next hour or so was spent with them being asked a ton of questions and organizing a schedule for them. Jared would be put in general training for the time being to develop his skills, while Jensen would pick up advanced combat. The question if they wanted to share a room was answered with a yes by both of them, so they were assigned a small hut on level three at the east side.

Jensen would also join the general council, Jared would be asked to do so after completing his mandatory training.

Before they were dismissed Samantha asked about their cuffs.

»We don´t really know. Jared cut himself by accident and bled all over it. The cuff broke. So I cut my hand and bled on his, causing it to break. No idea why it worked«, Jensen answered.

»Huh«, Sam responded. »Interesting. We had some people bleed on others cuffs during battle and they didn´t break.«

»Maybe it depends on the nature of the relationship.« Misha´s comment had Jared and Jensen both blushing.

Tahmoh chuckled: »You can go now if you want.«

»One question«, Jensen remembered before he got up. »Is Tom still here?«

»Not right now, we transferred him over to the north coast for the winter«, Sam answered.

»Ok, thank you«, Jensen replied, getting up to leave.

Jard had rarely been so happy to get out of somewhere.

They didn´t have anything left to do today, but were both appointed to go see Felicia about their scars tomorrow. They were expected to pick up their routine by the day after.

 

»You are really cute when you blush«, Jensen whispered once they were out. »I´ll show you cute once we´re in our bed«, Jared retorted, turning a deeper shade of pink while watching Jensen´s adam´s apple bob as he swallowed.

»No doubt about that.« Jensen´s voice had dropped an octave, causing Jared´s stomach to flutter in anticipation.

»Oh gods, we should better hurry«, Jared breathed. Jensen only nodded, already tugging him along one of the bridges.

 

The second the door closed behind him Jensen was on him, body pressed to Jared´s in one long hard line, fingers twisting in his long hair, lips a breath away from Jared´s, hot air puffing against his bottom lip, darkened eyes fixed on Jared´s hazel.

Jared´s gaze dropped to Jensen´s mouth, his tongue sneaking out to touch his full upper lip. Jensen groaned, slanting their mouths together. A shiver went through Jared as their lips touched, his eyes falling closed.

He felt Jensen gently bite and tug at his bottom lip, eliciting a moan from Jared, who snaked his arms around Jensen´s neck to pull him closer. Jensen´s hands dropped from his hair to his waist, fingers closing on his hipbones.

Jensen´s stubble felt rough on Jared´s skin as they kissed, addicting. Feeling brave Jared wrapped one leg around Jensen´s hip, feeling the hard line of his cock press against his, sending new sparks of arousal up his spine.

Jensen seemed to have a similar idea, his hands wandering from his hips to his ass and sliding down lower to grip his thighs. They broke apart to catch their breath, Jensen panting »I can carry you«, into the small space between them.

In one swift move Jared pulled his other leg up, Jensen supporting his weight as they wrapped around his waist. While he now was almost a head taller than Jensen and had to lean even more down, the new position caused his hard length to press right against Jensen´s belly, Jensen´s cock pressing up at his perineum. So close to where he wanted it.

They were both frozen, Jensen staring up at him, sharing the same air. In the blink of an eye they were kissing again and Jared rolled his hips down experimentally.

Jensen almost dropped him, groaning deep in his throat. As he had caught his balance he quickly strode over to the bed, unceremoniously dropping Jared on it, who bounced up and down a little at the impact. He laughed.

»The effect you have on me«, Jensen grumbled, crawling between Jared´s splayed legs, towering over him.

»Gods, come over here and fuck me«, Jared sighed, playful smile on his lips, fingers tracing up Jensen´s side.

»What happened to the shy kid I new all those years ago?«, Jensen mused, while leaning down. »Not that I´m complaining.«

»He grew up.«

»And he did that damn well«, Jensen gave him a quick kiss on the lips, drawing back again. »Are you really sure?«

»Yes. Even though I might change my mind with how long it is taking you«, Jared teased.

»You are so gonna pay for that«, Jensen reprimanded in the same playful tone, giving him a more lingering kiss this time, fingers working on the laces of Jared´s shirt.

Meanwhile Jared fumbled with pulling Jensen´s shirttails from his pants, failing entirely as Jensen´s lips closed around his right nipple, beard scraping his chest in delicous contrast to the wet heat of Jensen´s mouth. Jared arched his chest, wanting nothing more than to be closer, groaning as Jensen suckled on the hardend nub, narrowing Jared´s world down to Jensen. Only Jensen.

Jensen, who right now let off the pink bud, blowing cold air on it, making Jared shudder and gasp before giving his left nipple the same attention, twisting the other between his fingers.

»Gods, Jensen, stop!«, Jared managed to grit out as Jensen gently bit down on his sensitive flesh.

»Am I hurting you?«, worry immediately creeped into Jensen´s voice.

»No, no, it´s that I´m about to come and you are neither naked nor in me and that is unacceptable«, Jared breathed out, finally succeeding in getting Jensen´s shirt out of his pants and up over his head.

»You have no idea how amazing you are, do you?«, Jensen muttered, diving down again to kiss Jared, their bare chests sliding together.

After they broke apart Jensen touched their foreheads together. »I need to open you up, it´s gonna hurt but I will make you feel so good, I promise.«

With these words Jensen left Jared lying on the bed, who was about to protest until he saw Jensen rummaging through their things to find some kind of lubricant. He stripped away his shirt as he waited for Jensen to come back. He smirked, hooking his thumbs in the waistband of his pants. as Jensen turned back to him, small container in his hand.

»Pants too?«, he asked innocently, watching Jensen´s eyes darken even more. Jensen nodded, shucking down his own pants before climbing back into bed with Jared.

»Is that my emergency healing cream?«, Jared inquired as he got a better look at the container Jensen had brought. Jensen bit his lip, nodding.

Jared laughed, pulling Jensen close again. »That´s ok, just wanna know what you are putting in my ass.«

This earned him a chuckle and a blush from Jensen who leaned in to kiss him.

Jared tensed at the first touch to his hole, but relaxed again quickly.

Jensen kept distracting him with short nips to his chest and teasing little kisses and too quick touches to Jared´s achingly hard cock. Even if his life had depended on it, Jared wouldn´t have been able to tell how he went from having the pad of Jensen´s finger circle his rim to having two fingers knuckle deep in his ass.

Then Jensen crooked his fingers, touching a spot inside of him that send sparks fly behind his eyes and his dick throb with pleasure.

»Just one more Jaybird, ok?«, Jensen whispered in his ear, gently biting his earlobe.

»Please«, Jared begged.

Jensen complied, the stretch only a little uncomfortable. »Please, Jensen, I need you.«

Jensen reached for the container but Jared stopped him. »Lemme.«

He dipped his fingers in the cream, reaching down, coating Jensen´s cock, slickening it up, watching Jensen´s face closely, seeing the lines of pleasure and concentration on his features.

As Jensen entered him, he was careful, giving Jared time to adjust, his thrusts shallow at first, going deeper and deeper each time.

Soon they were both panting, chasing their release, Jensen reaching between them to pull at Jared´s cock, but Jared took his hand, guiding it to his chest. It only took one, two more thrusts against his sweet spot and Jensen twisting his nipple just right and Jared was coming between them, white come striping their bellies.

Jensen came quickly after, whimperig softly as Jared´s tight heat send him over the edge.


	5. Chapter 5

Felicia was a short red head with a smile twice her size. Jared immediately liked her.

»Hi, you must be Jared? I´m Felicia. I heard you are a healer too? Well I am here to get rid off the scars that you couldn´t«, she quipped as she swooshed around him, pointing to a chair for him to sit. She was pushing all kinds of things into Jared´s arms, smiling up at him. »Now drop them.« Jared opened his mouth to ask for the sense behind this, but after spitting out the first "Wh-", Felicia tapped her index finger against his lip to shut him up. »I´ll absorb energy. The energy which is transferred during a fall that is. It is really easy to tap in to that process.« His puzzled expression caused her to elaborate. »Having cells regenerate and not form scar tissue is an extremely exhausting process for both the healer and the patient. Sorry. It will tingle.«

Jared only nodded. Then he dropped everything he had in his arms.

Surprisingly none of it broke.

»Perfect, sit down«, Felicia pushed him into the seat standing right in the middle of the room, pulling a stool towards it to sit down herself. »This will not be pleasant, but I guarantee you will love the result.« She smiled at him, motioning for him to roll up his shirt sleeve. He complied.

Felicia rubbed her hands together for a second and then lay her right one with the palm down atop the brand marking him as a unspecified gifted. He looked at her questioningly. Then he felt it.

It was spreading slowely from his mark, the feeling quite similar to the one of the energy cursing through him after Jensen had unblocked his powers. He gritted his teeth together, the feeling intesifying. Felicia had her brows furrowed in concentration.

After a few more moments she drew her hand back, allowing Jared to look at his forearm.

There was nothing but smooth, unmarred skin where his brand had been for over twenty years. There was not trace left that it had ever been there in the first place. Jared looked up at Felicia who was just drinking from a cup, gathering her strength again. A slow smile spreading across his face, he knew that if it weren´t for the joy thrumming through his veins he would feel quite drowsey right now. He wanted to thank her, so he did the one thing he knew would convey his gratitude best. He wrapped her in a bone crushing hug.

Felicia laughed, sound muffled by the cup and Jared´s chest. »Easy, big boy, we stll have one to go.«

 

The day of Jared´s first training he ate in the cantina like every one else. Well everyone else except Jensen, because apparently he had a briefing to attend. Jared looked up from his meal as three people plopped down opposite him.

»Hello there« the one in the middle with shaggy golden brown hair and sunlight colored eyes greeted with a radiant smile. »I´m Rich.«

Jared nodded. »Good for you.«

The man on the left chuckled. He was dark haired and the tallest on the three.

The man on the right spoke next. »No, I mean. I´m Rob«, he waved a little awkwardly. »He is Rich. And that´s Matt.«

»We´re in a band«, Matt added.

Jared looked at them, not quite sure what to make of the unusual trio.

»Yup, _Earth Wind and Fire_ , that´s us«, Richard beamed.

»Come again?«, Jared asked, curiosity woken, even though he felt too sleepy for such a conversation.

»Well«, Matt elaborated. »He is air«, he pointed at Rob. »He is fire and I am earth.«

»We thought it has a nice ring to it«, Rob added.

»It does«, Jared agreed. »How long have you guys been...?«

» _Earth Wind and Fire_?«, Rob twitched nervously on his seat. »About twenty five minutes?«

»Before that we were the _Harmonic Vegetable Garden_. Didn´t fly so well«, Matt winked.

Meanwhile Richard happily munched his carrots. Jared smiled at Rob who seemed to grow a little.

»Rob«, Richard said, calm, eyes not leaving Jared and smile still in place. »Huh?«, Rob replied, jiggling up and down a little. »You are levitating again«, Richard smirked.

»Oh.« Rob plopped back down, causing Jared to snort out a laugh.

 

As it turned out his trainer, Osric, was a twenty three summers young man with tipped warm eyes and an enthusiasm that topped even Jared´s. He also knew quite well what he was doing and demonstrated an impressive choreography of weaponless combat paired with the use of his powers. It was art.

Jared´s eyes grew wide as he saw Osric twirling in the air, water running along his arm and splashing to the nearest tree.

»Now who wants to go first?«, Osric asked cheerfully after landing catlike and quiet.

Jared looked around. Every child around him, the tallest of them barely reaching his hip looked expectantly at him. In the _Save us you giant_ kind of way. Jared swallowed

 

»So how was it?«, Jensen couldn´t suppress a smirk as Jared walked into their room, hair still dripping wet and a storm cloud on his face.

»What do you think?«, Jared grumbled as he fell down on Jensen´s bed.

»Hey, you´re gonna get it wet«, Jensen mockingly scowled before falling down beside his lover.

»The oldest of them, Aeren, she is nine! And she managed to almost drown me in a tsunami wave. And then she giggled. My shins hurt like you wouldn´t believe because those midgets only attack what they can reach. Which means that my torso got away a little better. But Jensen, I can´t punch little kids!«

»What about Osric?«

The glance Jared shot Jensen was potentially dangerous.

»Jay, I am sorry but you are too damn adorable for your good when you are mad«, Jensen smiled, brushing Jared´s wet hair from his eyes.

With a growl Jared flipped them, pinning Jensen to the bed with his weight, his taller frame looming over him.

Jensen grew tense beneath him even before Jared could dive down. The pent up aggression in Jared started to fade as he saw the twisted lines of Jensen´s jaw and that his boyfriend was not at all comfortable.

»What?«, Jared asked, concern rising up at the too controlled breaths Jensen took, like he was fighting an inner battle.

»Jay, I am more than willing to take your edge off, but please not like this. I have been on the receiving end of a man´s anger one too many times«, Jensen´s voice was impossibly small, yet steady.

One look at Jensen´s face and he knew what Jensen was talking about. He quickly rolled off him, gathering him loosely in his arms. He stroked his hair carefully, his anger evaporating at seeing the darkness Jensen dealt with. »Gods, I am so sorry«, he whispered.

»Don´t worry«, Jensen replied, as if to soothe Jared. »It was bound to happen at some point and I got through it. I made it, even though I almost lost it once. Just... Don´t restrain me, don´t trap me. Please«, Jensen explained further. Immediately Jared tried to take his arms back, knowing that an embrace could feel like a trap.

»No«, Jensen pulled his arms around again, settling against Jared´s chest, continuing like had read Jared´s thoughts. »This is not a trap. If anything this is protection. Jared, I trust you. I know you will always keep me safe. But sometimes a single move can make me remember what happened. I will tell you and I know you don´t do it on purpose. I know you wouldn´t hurt me on purpose, Jay. And of course I can understand if you don´t want to... Have this anymore with me, now that you know« Jensen´s expression was open and Jared could see the trust in his eyes as well as the fear and insecurity.

»So that´s why you always ask me if I am okay«, Jared whispered, thinking out loud. »That is why you always...« He trailed off. _Why you always try to keep control._

Jensen just nodded, eyes turned down in shame.

»Hey«, Jared nudged his face up with his nose. »It´s okay.« He gently captured Jensen´s lips in a lingering kiss, trying to convey everything he didn´t know how to say with the simple gesture.

As he drew back he searched Jensen´s eyes, seeing all his insecurities layed bare in them.

 _»Iò thánen._ I won´t leave you because of this. Not unless you want me to.«

»Never. _Thexí_ «, Jensen replied, rubbing his nose along Jared´s.

 

 

_A few weeks later_

 

Jared woke up with Jensen´s arm across his chest, pulling him close to him. He quietly turned, Jensen´s features were open in his sleep. The crinkles around his eyes were barely visible, the freckles across his nose not sticking out against pale skin but blending in with the healthy color the sun had brought him. His hair was sticking in all different angles, mussed from their activities the previous night.

With a shock Jared noticed that the sun was shining through the window of their room. It had to be almost noon.

»Jensen.«

Jensen moved his head a little, rubbing his cheek against the pillow like a cat.

»Jensen!«, Jared hissed, louder this time.

»Wha? Lemme sleep« Jensen mumbled, words slurred by sleepiness.

»No. Jensen, we need to get up, I have training, you have whatever and we missed breakfast!« Breakfast was the most important thing to Jared.

»No we didn´t. There´s no training today. And breakfast is whenever we want. So sleep«, Jensen took Jared´s arm and reversed their positions, wriggling a little until he fit his back snugly against Jared´s chest.

It took Jared a second to focus, since there was a warm, pliant, sleepy Jensen in his arms.

»Why?«, he rasped eventually.

» _Anéro Thàsha_. I´ll explain later. Now sleep Jared, least a few more minutes«, Jensen buried himself in his pillow and Jared´s embrace.

Jared slipped his hand lower on Jensen´s abdomen, feeling the slightly squishy tummy. Jared smiled as he felt the minimal swell of Jensen´s belly. He had put on some weight since they arrived at the camp. This Jensen was so different from the one he had encountered all those weeks ago.

His hipbones weren´t sticking out anymore, he couldn´t count his ribs just by looking at him and his skin wasn´t so sickly pale. There were still the scars from the whipping criss crossing his back though.

His Jensen.

Jared trailed his fingers over the scars, his brow furrowed as he tried to understand the pattern, feeling the muscle relax under his touch.

»Why did you keep them?«

»Hm«, Jensen mumbled, almost asleep.

»You let Felicia heal your brands. Why not your back?«, Jared clearified.

Jensen turned. »Because they´re part of me. And opposite the brand they can´t get me killed«, Jensen could see that Jared wasn´t satisfied with his answer. »Jaybird. My past has been filled with bad and good and both shaped me into who I am. I know you see them as a constant reminder of the bad. But to me they´re not. I have them because I met you. If I hadn´t I would be a bloodied up corpse lying in a ditch for all to see. Like the one on my wrist they remind be to keep going. That the pain will fade and I will heal.«

He pressed a kiss to the tip of Jared´s nose, chuckling at the whine he got in response, kissing him on the lips then.

»I love you. Sleep, Jaybird.«

Jared smiled at him as Jensen´s eyes slid closed and went back to sleep.

 

The next time he woke up he was missing Jensen´s warmth at his side. He sat up to see Jensen arrange a few bowls on a small table beside two stools. There were paint brushes beside the bowls and some cloth on the table as well.

»What´s that for?«, Jared asked, blinking the last bits of sleepiness away.

»C´mere and I´ll explain it to you«, Jensen beckoned him over. »Sit.«

Jared sat down on one of the stools, peeking into the bowels. They were filled with all sorts of colorful paint, several blues and greens, a little bit of brown, white and black. He looked at Jensen.

»It´s _Anéro Thàsha_ , the night the sky is set aflame. Once a year the gods send a special light that lights up the night skies in blues and greens, yellows and reds, sometimes violet... It´s beautiful. It is a northern custom to celebrate it accordingly. It´s a feast to thank the gods for our gifts and celebrate the living.«

»Sounds great«, Jared smiled. »What´s the paint for?«

»Facepaint«, Jensen explained. »You paint your face in the colors and pattern of your gift, the blues and white as well as a little bit of green for you, the greens, brown and black for me. I thought we could paint eachother, if that´s ok?«

»Sure«, Jared replied, any reason to touch Jensen´s face was fine with him.

Jensen´s smile lit up the room. »First I need to get your hair out of your face«, he mumbled, quickly getting Jared´s comb and pulling the stool closer to Jared.

He combed through the messy strands, braiding them on the left side and leaving them loose on the other.

»Only one side?«, Jared remarked.

Jensen nodded. »Left for you, because you are more emotion driven, right for me because I control through thought.«

Jared didn´t reply to that, seeing the concentrated look on Jensen´s face as he choose a brush and color. The brush was thick and the bristles soft and Jensen dipped it into the bright blue.

»Close your eyes.«

Jared did. The tentative touch of the brush on his skin felt wonderful. He kept his eyes closed, losing himself on the feel of Jensen carefully creating a pattern of color on his left side, tips of it reaching over his nose to his right. He could almost see how Jensen had his tongue pushed at his teeth in concentration. The paint was cool against his skin, it didn´t itch, it only felt unfamiliar.

»I´m done, open your eyes«, Jensen´s voice was quiet, like he didn´t dare disturb Jared´s peace.

Jared blinked his eyes open, gaze falling on the mirror Jensen was holding infront of him.

Spanning half his face was a pattern of blue green waves with white highlights. It was mesmerizing, the waves moving like an ocean when ever Jared as much as twitched a muscle.

»You did this before, didn´t you?«, he asked.

»I did Chris´s for a few years. Fire and water have very similar patterns. By the way, Chris is coming up for this«, Jensen informed him.

Jared put the mirror down. »And what´s the pattern for earth?«

»It´s kind of like a tree. deep green on a brown skeleton with green highlights«, Jensen explained. »Black for dark highlights. If that makes sense.«

Jared nodded. »I´ll do my best.«

»Thanks«, Jensen mumbled, closing his eyes.

Jared chose the deep green as his foundation, taking the broadest brush and applying the color in swift strokes to Jensen´s face, letting it fade from right to left in thinner lines.

He also put the color on Jensen´s closed eyelid, covering the entire half of his face in color.

He then picked up a smaller brush, dipping it in the brown, tracing branch-like lines across Jensen´s cheekbone, his brow, the bridge of his nose, the bow of his lips.

He put a little black beneath his cheekbone, highlighting his excellent bone structure, and light green to the brown lines, trying to create the illusion of a living tree.

After checking his work from different angles and deeming it good enough he picked up the mirror.

»Look?«, he didn´t know why it came out like a question.

Jensen opened his eyes, bright emerald shining amidst a swirl of green. Jensen took a peek in the mirror, smiling.

»It´s perfect.«

Jared blushed.

 

The feast was in full swing, tables put up around the clearing. Rob and the others were responsible for the music, the sun had set and everyone was eating, drinking and enjoying themselves.

Jared sat beside Jensen, a question burning on his tongue, as they heard shouting coming from the other side of the clearing followed by the cracking sound of splintering wood.

Jared was quickly on his feet running towards the tumult, Jensen at his heels.

The sight he came to was not what he had expected.

Chris and Chad were both standing beside a broken table, chests heaving. Chad´s lip was split and a thin trail of blood running down his chin.

»Asshole«, Chad spat, surging forward the same moment Chris did.

Just that they didn´t throw another punch. They collided in a kiss, Chad clawing at Chris face, Chris fingers twisting in his shirt, the colors on their faces smearing.

Jensen whistled, the bystanding crowd exploding in cheers.

»Nine years have we waited for this. You have no idea what kind of torture that was«, Jensen chuckled, leaning into Jared´s side.

Jared joined the catcalls, while slipping his arm around Jensen´s waist.

 

The sound of a horn caused Chris and Chad to break apart, and the rest of the group to move to the clearing.

The first colored lights were visible in the sky.

Jared watched the lights dancing, twirling, multi colored and seemingly effortless.

Jensen watched the lights dance in Jared´s eyes. A question was burning on his tongue.

Before he could ask, Jared turned to him, saying: »So, I know this is out of the blue and all, but...uhm. _Iò thánen anà corá. Heléyio?«_

_I love you. Marry me?_

Jensen stared at Jared,not able to comprehend what he had heard. Seeing that Jared was about to backpaddle he whispered: »That´s my line. I...« Stronger he said: » _Fà._ Yes. Of course.«

Jared´s smile shone brighter than the flames in the sky.

 

**Author's Note:**

> R&R please?  
> Love,  
> the shadowcat


End file.
